Overhaulin'

Is there some kind of a kelly blue book for classic cars? I would like to know how much I can sell my 79 impala 305 V* that has 17k miles on it for,... I definitely think with 18,000 original miles, ( 9,000 of which were put on in the last year) that this car is a classic,...

How can I find the value of a classic car? I would like to find the value of a 1969 Pontiac Fire-bird 400 HO. Kelley Blue book doesn't go back that many years and I tried www.nadaguides.com, but that site doesn't go through questions like Kelley Blue book does and I would like to know if there is a website similar to Kelly Blue books for classic car values. Thanks for any help.

where can i find the value of my classic car i have a 1965 mercury comet? is there a kelly blue book for classic cars

How much would this classic sports car sell for today? I don't think Kelley Blue Book takes into consideration if a car is a classic or not. It's a 1985 300 ZX Turbo with about 70,000 miles on it. Been garage kept ever since and it's basically in like perfect condition. How many thousands would it go for today you think? Thanks guys!

Question on title transfer of a classic car in WA state? So DOL website say you have to pay taxes on fair market value. I am looking at a car that is for sale for $1500, but low blue book is $10,000. I know they won't let me pay taxes on the $1500. There has to be an easy way around this. What is it?

How can i find the value of a classic car online? Kelly Blue Book doesnt go beyond 1988. I need 1970.

HOW CAN I FIND THE BLUE BOOK VALUE OF MY 1979 EL CAMINO IN FORT SMITH AR? My car has a dent in one side, the interior needs to be redone. The outside is scratched a little and it needs shocked. I want to know if I keep it, will the value go up? I got it when I was seventeen and I know nothing about classic cars or cars period.

how can i find a base value for classic cars? I'm looking for a way to determine a base value, similar to a kelly blue book, for classic volkswagons. I am mostly looking at the VW Beetles from the 60's. Is there a resource similar to the blue book to help me out?

Get a value for my Classic Car So I can sell it? 66 Dodge Furry 2 , need to blue book it.

How much is my 1972 Plymouth Grand Fury worth? I don't think the original engine is in there. It has a 383 Chrysler 727 transmission and very minimal rust. The paint is good and the interior is in better than fair condition. I am also looking for a web blue book for classic cars. I cannot find the value of this car anywhere on the internet.

1979 AMC sell it to "we buy junk" should i? i just boght not too long ago an 1979 AMC concord 4dr sedan 6cylinder inline 4.2L engine, atuomatic trans, power steering, power locks. The car did not run, so i did some work on it and made it run with just what seams like a rod knock, cam knocking, or the bearings since i can hear most of it at the bottom back of the engine in torque converter area. i originally bought it for $250 and put about 100$ into reparing. now iam just tired of fixing it since i dont have anytime and too tired to stay up till 3am and waking up at 7am to go to school. i put an ad on penny saver http://www.pennysaverusa.com/info/showinfo.aspx?id=e000515695 but no one seams to be intrested, what if i was to sell it to like a we buy junk type of thing, how much would they give me, could it possobly at least $300 the classic car blue book value of it is $800 in fair condition, which is about where mine stands. so what do you think?

Is there a way to get my '69 camaro appraised online? I tried kelly blue book online and they only give values from 1989 on. Are there any other sites like kelly blue book for classic cars?

do you know a sight that could tell me how much my classic car is worth? i tried kelly blue book, but they dont do cars older than 88. i have a 1971 chevy and im curious how much its worth. thanks!

Classic car question 1969 mustang? i have a 1969 ragtop convertable ford mustang (only 5000 made) but its in very bad condition i need to know how much its worth i tried looking it up on blue book but it dosent have that old of cars

Car accident classic car? I have a 1977 plymouth volare primer station wagon was going down the road and car behind me did not slow down and the driver wasn't paying attenion. they swerved at the last minute to the left and lost control and hit the driver side of my car at the front and back driver side door it smashed both doors in cracked front window and may have bent the frame it was the other drivers fault we are both insured their car is a90s or 2000 model mine is a 77 model i have contacted my insurance my car is a long way from perfect but it had been taken care of well the blue book value said at low retail it was worth 3grand dont think i will get that will the insurance company fix it or total it or what im not trying to be selfish but its the only car i have and i dont have the money to get a nother car. what will happen

Website for values of classic cars? Is there a website similar to Kelley Blue Book tht lists the values of classic cars. Kelley only seems to go back to no earlier then 1990 or so.

Kelley Blue Book Value? Tried looking on kbb.com for the listed price on a 1975 Ford Mustang which is in good condition...but i noticed that the "year" catagory was never older than 1987...im looking into buying this car from a dealer...and wanted to get the price for it so i could apply for a loan...does the kbb apply to classic cars like that? or can anyone help me out...im pretty sure i could get the loan because the car is only 7,000...ive seen it and it is a very nice looking car...plz help...if any more info is needed just ask in your question

Is the 05 chevy malibu and the 05 chevy classic the same car? Is the 05 malibu the same thing as the 05 classic? I see different pictures and under both kelley blue book and edmunds they are listed separately and the prices are quite different. The dealer I'm trying to buy from told me it was a malibu and is now saying its a malibu classic. I've run the vin number on two different websites. One says its a classic and one says its a malibu classic. I thought the malibu classic only reffered to the 08 model. The price I was offered was fair for a malibu but not for a classic. Please help.

Im wanting to sell my 1965 el camino classic as fast as possible but can not afford to pay for AD PLACEMENT u My car is a classic 1965 el camino. It was given to me by a friend who has now passed. I am financially strapped right now and need to sell A.S.A.P.The blue book value for this car was around $6,950.I am asking for $4000. The car was in the process of being painted until my friend passed so although all the original parts are the they are not attatched to the vehicle. THE CAR IS ALL ORIGINAL STOCK PARTS AND IS COMPLETE. PLEASE HELP ME.

Where can I find out how much my car is worth? I have a classic impala and no blue book doesn't work only goes to 2010 or if your good with this kinda stuff and i can email u

Hello car enthusiasts, what cars would u buy for under 6k ? (in US)? Hello ppl :) I m looking for another used car, and I dont know which 1 is the best to buy :| My budget is tight < 6k :D , but I want reliability, cheap to fair maintenace cost, sporty look and the most importance: Max power and highest MPG possible . Celica GTS gets good MPG, good looking + reability, but I doubt that the 2zzge is slow and perform like the 1zzge (regular corolla or Celica GT) at low RPM, when Lift doesnt kick in. DC5 RSX S gets good MPG, reliability, parts availability, but the look is not too modern and is hard to find a good one for < 6k lol 03+ Tiburon gets very good review on K.Blue book, look wonderful, fair MPG, but I doubt about reliability + parts available (rareness) + 2.5 V6 170hp but it s not fast Mazdaspeed Protege has stock turbo, light, look fun to drive, however it looks old + cheap interior, and I doubt about reliability because it may have an Ford engine. Subaru WRX, very fast, 4 doors roomy 4wd, cool car, but maintenance cost is higher than Toy or Honda I guess ? MPG is not high. may be its hard to find a good WRX for ~ < 6k Scion Tc, hmm looks good to me w some mods, good interior, good reliability + MPG, but many ppl says the 2.4 160hp is slow, + hard to find for <6k Mr2 Spyder is good + rare, may have value when becomes classic car. Toyota reliability, not too slow bc it s light. But it s too dangerous to drive w lifted trucks + 18 wheels on freeways :( Honda Prelude: hmm, realibility + 200hp + parts availability + built as a sport car, but the interior looks too old :( + the ugly flat + long hood, front end) Srt 4 w stock turbo ~ 230 hp, but is hard to find <6k and I doubt about engine longevity + cheap interior, the exterior looks good though :) .... also IS300, GS300, 98+ SLK, 98+ Z3, 98+ 3series, 00 Audi TT, ....... omg .. a small pocket vs big dreams :|

Any Insurance Agents/Adjusters out there? I am a lady in my 60's. I am a car person, having Classic Shows Cars for years. So...I take great care of all my cars. They are in A1 condition. I have an '85 Buick Regal that I have been paying full coverage insurance on for 22 yrs. The car is immaculate. Blue book at this point is very low. Under $2,000. I recently hit a tree with the right front of the car and the estimate is $3,200 to fix it. Needs a fender, hood and other items. The insurance company says they will not pay to fix it because the value is lower that the cost to fix it. BULL I told them. I have been paying you for 22 yrs and have FULL ($300 deductible) COVERAGE. What Legal Theory are you using? If I pay you, then you pay me, no matter what the cost is. That is what I pay that premium for every year. My question: How can they do this? It can't be legal! If they won't fix it then they should return all my premiums. right? to: "fighting saints" Yes, I do have my classics insured with specialty insurance. One car is insured for $100,000, so I know about that. Just angry that they will not pay for the repairs. The car is NOT a total wreck. It can easily be fixed.

How old must a car be until it falls into the antique, or collectible classification? I have a black 1999 Toyota Solara SLE coupe, garage kept, with 31000 miles on it in good condition. It will be 10 years old soon. When could it be considered a classic or collectable car--or will it at all? Would antique or collectable status increase its value? Although it is still a very fine fine car, it is now nearing ten years old and is presently worth little at the present time, compared to new vehicle prices, and I would like a newer car soon. Should I sell it now and buy a new one, or keep it as an antique? I could really use what ever trade in allowence I got from it towards a new car but I don't want to throw it away either! It's present blue book value on trade is about $6500 to $7000 Thanks...

In an accident with an older car, how is value determined?? I am considering buying a "classic". Are they more expensive to insure?? And ALSO, if I were to get in an accident, how do they determine the value on that. I know about Blue Book/NADA, but I always thought that was more of a guideline for current cars?? Just curious. Thanks!! :)

How much could I sell my 1982 Jaguar XJ6 for? I have a 1982 Jaguar XJ6 with 130,000 miles on it in almost mint condition. The body is perfect with no dents and somehow the original paint still looks brand new even though I've heard the paint on my year is supposed to be horrible. There is not rust, no cracks, fade, or tears in the leather at all. The car looks almost brand new. Also the car has no mechanical problems as of this morning. This is the standard XJ6 with power windows, locks, sunroof, steering, and brakes, automatic transmission. I was wondering how much the value of this car is since it is in almost mint condition and is now a classic and is too old to find the price on Kelly Blue Book. I got a deal on this car for $1,500. Thanks in advance.

How much is this car worth? I'm trying to sell this thing and I need some ideas for a price range. Sure, blue book can give me a good idea, but it doesn't take minor things into account, or things other than factory specs. It's a 1990 Miata MX5. It has a few little nicks in the paint, but the main problem is the roof. It is a convertible, and one of the latches is preventing it from closing properly (a piece snapped off), so some water leaks in when it rains, causing mildew to form and a musty smell. Other than those minor issues, it's a great car. It runs well, the engine sounds amazing, and it was in one minor fender-bender involving a mailbox and the driverside door (according to my grandmother, the previous owner of it). Everything to the car is original, except for the radio. Some asshole decided to nab it one day while the roof was down. The luggage rack is also missing, but it can be easily replaced if it's a massive issue. This car hugs the road and rides smoothly. This car is a 'classic', as grandmother says. There weren't many of these made that year, or something like that. If I can scrub out the mildew and keep the car covered until the point it is sold (and also make sure it smells nice n clean), how much do you think it is worth? Grandmother suggests I start the price at 4 grand and willingly haggle down to 2. She says that there are collectors that "just love them some old cars". Trade-in value is $1200. So, in all honesty, how much do you think I could get for it? Ah, almost forgot! It's got about 95,000 miles on it. Not bad for a 20 year old car ;-)

Got in a car accident-what to do? I got in a car accident two days ago. It was a really small one where both drivers were at fault. We backed into each other at a gas station. We got out to exchange information and look at the damage my car had none his had a small dent. He said he didn't have insurance, but we exchanged information and I told him to give me an estimate. I also took a picture on the dent. He comes back two days later with an estimate of $800 dollars in damages. This if for a 1991 Camaro which is worth $2,500 according to Blue Books if its in excellent condition, his car is not. He said it was so expensive because his car is a classic, which its not. That's a lot of money so I decided to go through my insurance. When I call to tell him that he now says he has insurance. I asked him why he said he didn't have insurance at the accident. He said its because he thought I would want to go under the table. To which I said when someone asks for your car insurance information and you actually have it the correct response isn't to say, "I just got this car I don't have insurance on it yet." Which is exactly what he said. He's also asking me to tell my insurance the accident is my fault, which its not. Another thing the VIN number on his car doesn't match the VIN number on his engine. He said its cause the engine was replaced, but I automatically thought stolen. I'm looking for thoughts on whats going on here and anything I should be cautious of. Thanks!

how can i get the value of a vehicle 1984 or older, i'm looking at cadillac that is for sale.? the used car dealership where the cadillac is located is asking 8,999 for the vehicle, but the vehicle is in great condition and only has 25,000 original miles so they told me. i tried to look up the value of this vehicle on the kelly blue book & nada web site but neither went further than 1985. nada had a section for classic cars but the value it gave me was no more than 4,000, and the description section wouldn't let me put the miles of the car in. me personaly i think thats alot but the miles are low and the car looks great.

How much should I expect to get when I trade in my truck (07 Silverado)? I have a 2007 Classic Silverado reg cab short bed, 4.8 V8 Work Truck. 17,500 miles. Blue book trade in says 9900. How accurate do you think that would be? If it depends on the new car it will probably be a tacoma. Thanks, Brian

Anyone think this story has any potential for a book and or movie.? So im at school with all my friends with my sister and friends and then there is a zomibe outbreak. So everybody freaks out and panics then all is fine. There are a few floores we’re on the top floor with water surrounding it . And there is holes to the second floor. Which has water on it to. A zomibe attacks us every so often but we take care of it. The zombies come in waves. Young humans first, teenager, adults, then domestic animals cats dogs little birds, then wild animals like birds of prey and zebras, then big wild animals like tigers lions and stuff, then all the prehistoric stuff like dinasours and mammoths and stuff. All the while this is happening the water goes down. We go into this one run totally in water and we have masks on we get out of there because its to hard to breath with our little air masks. So we sit it out on this fountain type thing. After about the wil animals like tigers came we got outside. And we’re running to our cars. But the birds come in storms and keep attacking us. There is this winding narrow path above the ground. All the kids then leave. But as im leaving I fall through the floor and I can hear a huge buffalo type animal. And he’s right next to me. So I don’t move and just sit there. He sniffes me for about 20 minutes he then walks off but I do something and he runs right back to me and gentle knocks me over and smells me more. He then pushes me around a bit but I still play dead. Then out of the blue this guy in this weird looking truck comes full speed and just runs right into the bull like prehistoric creature. I then run to his truck and thank him and thank him and thank him. He tells me he must have escaped from the zoo a fem miles down. And im thinking what zoo??? I then ask him for a ride to the front of the school so I can get my car and go home (im in high school). As we’re driving hes telling me how he doesn’t know why im here and that they closed the school 3 years earlier. He then shows me these automated “buses” that kids use to drive to school them selves. They look like phone booths with thrusters to fly. Im thinking this guys freakin crazy. He drives me to my car and my piece of crap is sitting there and he starts freaking out saying of my god you have a classic car? They havn’t made those for years and how the company was shut down. Im thinking whats this guy thinking then it hits me………… and I ask him, what year is it? And he says its 2019 why? And I start freaking out because it was 2009 the day my school was over run. I run to my car and start it up and I grab my wallet (with my drivers license) and show him my license. Its all weathered but easily readable. He’s like what the hell 2009? That was 10 years ago. I then ask him for a phone book which he gives me I then look up my last name and recognize my sisters and mothers name. So I drive down to my house and its this huge house on this hill. So I just walk on in and wait for them to return. My sister comes back first and I scare her she thinks im a robber or something. And I quickly calm her down and explain to her who I am. She runs to my arms and hugs me. And then my mom gets home and does the same. I then ask……..Where’s dad? They then say , With tears in their eyes. He left when you never came home. And I start crying feeling so homesick for my father. Even though in my time its only been like an 8 hour school day I haven’t seen them. To them it has been 10 years. I go into the bathroom and I’m about 25 looking and im like wow that is so weird. I then go drive around town looking for some of my friends. This is when I awoken. When i wrote this is when i awoken i mean this was an actual dream i had.

My ins agency is giving me about $3-5k less than fair market value on my car. What can I do? I was involved in an auto accident which was my fault. Took my 86 mercedes to get worked on and total came to about $5600. State Farm decided to total my car. At first they said the web-site they use was nada.com. ( I was told that by 2 seperate people) Then when it came time to pay out they said because my car was older it goes to a different web-site as it's considered a classic. I could not find any prices on that web-site(must have to suscribe to it). They are giving me $1875 for my car. nada.com has price ranges from $5600 to $11500. My car wasn't in perfect condition, but it would be considered great condition maybe $7k-$8k. Kelley blue book rates it from $ 4375-$8600. If i went by KBB may $5500- $6800. These prices seem like fair market value, but because there are no other same year cars being sold within 200+ miles of my town I feel I am being sent out to pasture. What can I or should I do to combat this!!

What cars (under 6k ) look sporty and are fun to drive ? Hello ppl :) I m looking for another used car, and I dont know which 1 is the best to buy :| My budget is tight < 6k :D , but I want reliability, cheap to fair maintenace cost, sporty look and the most importance: Max power and highest MPG possible . Celica GTS gets good MPG, good looking + reability, but I doubt that the 2zzge is slow and perform like the 1zzge (regular corolla or Celica GT) at low RPM, when Lift doesnt kick in. DC5 RSX S gets good MPG, reliability, parts availability, but the look is not too modern and is hard to find a good one for < 6k lol 03+ Tiburon gets very good review on K.Blue book, look wonderful, fair MPG, but I doubt about reliability + parts available (rareness) + 2.5 V6 170hp but it s not fast Mazdaspeed Protege has stock turbo, light, look fun to drive, however it looks old + cheap interior, and I doubt about reliability because it may have an Ford engine. Subaru WRX, very fast, 4 doors roomy 4wd, cool car, but maintenance cost is higher than Toy or Honda I guess ? MPG is not high. may be its hard to find a good WRX for ~ < 6k Scion Tc, hmm looks good to me w some mods, good interior, good reliability + MPG, but many ppl says the 2.4 160hp is slow, + hard to find for <6k Mr2 Spyder is good + rare, may have value when becomes classic car. Toyota reliability, not too slow bc it s light. But it s too dangerous to drive w lifted trucks + 18 wheels on freeways :( Honda Prelude: hmm, realibility + 200hp + parts availability + built as a sport car, but the interior looks too old :( + the ugly flat + long hood, front end) Srt 4 w stock turbo ~ 230 hp, but is hard to find <6k and I doubt about engine longevity + cheap interior, the exterior looks good though :) .... also IS300, GS300, 98+ SLK, 98+ Z3, 98+ 3series, 00 Audi TT, ....... omg .. a small pocket vs big dreams :|

Mint 89 deVille insurance? Ok, I had collision on the 89 Sedan deVille. The car is in beautiful shape- not a scratch on her, no sign of rust, engine is in perfect order (i've been gradually doing upgrades on things...hoses, fuel pump etc.....) People just oogle the thing when they see it, and their jaws drop when I tell them she just hit 122,000 miles. Still a pup! However, in a private resort, on Christmas Eve night, while driving SLOW, I couldn't make a turn on a very slick hill/turn and she just slid into a guard rail. According to the initial assement (crooks they are) she was a total loss (2400 in repairs, Blue Book is at about 2500) She needs a new bumper, headlight, side light and the parts that go along with that. So really just a cosmetic problem. Is there any insurance for this age of vehicle that is in supreme shape? I know there is "classic" car insurance, but she may be too young for that... but it's a classic anyhow and I'd like to keep her protected. Do I have any further options? Thanks much!!

i dont know how to find the value of a classic vehicle on kelly bluebook? it only gives me the option to check the value of cars from the 80's to now and the vehicle i need to value is from the 60's. is there a site i can go to to get the blue-book value of an older vehicle? better yet does anyone know what a 1965 Chevy step-side truck is worth? it is unrestored and needs some body work , nothing major, it runs and drives well, it has a 230 straight 6 . the guy who has it is saying its worth 6,500 as it is, does that sound way off?

Like or not? BE HONEST MY BOOK? Email me at candyeyed104@yahoo.com if you want to read the rest of the book! It was raining. It was freezing and all I was doing was studying, under a tree with a poncho on. I was so focused that I didn’t even think about how worried Lem might be. Then the next thing I know was hearing car tires screech and a bunch of people honking horns. Then, it was all a blur. When I arrived at the house, I first smelled the dew. Its odor smelled like wet dog, but I least we had it here. April was getting things out of the car. June was still in the car, shaking because she was nervous. July was doing her hair and September was yelling at her phone. Now, the first thing you might get in your head when you read this is that they’re my siblings, my answer to that is no. They were my cousins, but not my legal guardian. So, there I was smelling the dew and hearing the wind and trying to adapt to this new place. The only problem was, I didn’t want to adapt as the old Tory, and I wanted to be a different Tory. I had chosen about everything possible you could think of. Clothes, movies, colors, you name it. I was no longer the pitiful, crybaby Tory. I was someone I admired. I was planning my new life since I boarded the plane and left Lem. As soon as I stepped on the plane, I drew out a red notebook and wrote down every detail about the old Tory. I scanned it, and then did the opposite. For example, if I liked chicken as the old Tory I would love turkey as the new Tory. I sat down by a man, he smelled of strong cologne. He was wearing a tuxedo, his hair was slicked back and he was reading an article about fancy hotel rooms and how expensive some are. It must’ve been boring to him, because there on that very plane he slept. He snored, and worst of all talked in his sleep. He kept whispering this word: efficient. He was wearing cowboy boots, but I assumed they were more comfortable than his black, shiny shoes. I looked at him like he was a crazy guy, and then listened to the airplane music. You could either choose between country, classic, rock, pop and hip-hop. The old Tory would’ve chosen classical music over rock any day, but I wasn’t her anymore. The old Tory might have been terrified of planes, but I was fearless. The last time I heard Lem would be the time I became the new Tory. So, as soon as I heard her say a final goodbye, I took a wonderful first breath. The air was smooth, and smelled of many odors. Before the plane told us to buckle up, I was all confused about wear to sit. Tory would never been confused, but I was. The people looked at my ticket and pointed to a seat and I sat down there. When the flight began, I had my headphones on and I was too focused into the music to realize we were lifting off the ground and going in the sky. I was so quick; I was the first one off. Even though I wondered what the guy in the suit was going, I went inside the airport and I saw four faces that looked at me. With their eyes completely serious, their mouth quivering and their feet wobbling, I felt like I was being examined. I walked very slowly to them and the first thing I asked them wasn’t who they were. “Do you have any five size shoes? These are giving me blisters,” I smiled and that’s how they knew me as Tory. I was a happy Tory. “Yeah! Their red, the color you like? Lem sent me a whole list of things you dislike and like,” The girl was the tallest out of the four. She was the most energetic and her shoes looked like a giant would easily fit in them. Her eyes were green and a little bit of blue, her hair golden brown, as crispy as a saltine cracker. Her teeth had braces, the color orange. Her fingernails were painted orange, and the bow in her hair matched it. Her jeans were the exact same brand I was wearing. Her necklace said, “sand” and her shirt was a plain white tee. It nearly killed me to see her wear that, because she would definitely look better wearing her pajamas.

How much is my 1984 Chevy El Camino worth? I cant find a blue book value for a 1984 chevy el camino conquista edition. It has 40,000 miles on the chassis and engine, and the engine is a ss monte carlo 5.0 liter v8. Car isnt in absolute perfect shape but nothing major and nothing even noticable unless looking closely, (few hail dings,scratches in truck bed) but works mechanically 100% and body and interior is clean! AC, Heater and classic motorola cassette and radio!

What is currently the most expensive new vehicle to purchase? To be more precise, the most expensive car to physically roll of an assembly line- whether it be a Rolls Royce, Jaguar, BMW, whatever. I looked about six or seven years ago, and at that time it was a Jaguar, couldn't tell you model, its sticker price was a cool million. I'm figuring that with inflation, general price increase, that its probably not the most expensive anymore. No particular reason, I'm just asking. I like dreaming. Please refrain from posting classic vehicles too. I'm looking for vehicles that are brand new, coming right out of the factory. Also if you have a website that I can check out (and please no Kelly Blue Book or Autotrader.com), thanks. And yes, Tim I know no one is buying, hence the "I'm just dreaming" part of my question. I work at a car dealership. I have regrettably limited web access at work. So I would look up this info myself, but I don't have access to very much.

Hows my Book?????????????? http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2822683/1/Bloody_Kisses_Chapter_1 “Miss we’ve arrived”. Milly brooks averted her eyes from her dog eared copy of Othello and looked out of the tinted windows of the black range rover. A large wrought iron gate stared back, behind which classic Victorian style buildings made up the campus of Reynolds academy. As they drew near to the gate a female voice announced “name please” “Brooks” her driver declared. “Oh I see” the voice stiffened. “Welcome to the academy Ms. Brooks” the gates opened. Milly sighed. Ever since the incident she’d become accustomed to hearing that tone from almost everyone. The shocked judgmental slightly scared voice that everyone used when they heard her name or found out who she was. She guessed she would be hearing it just as much at this school as she had at the others. She honestly didn’t know what her uncle thought would be different about this school; they really were all the same. The car drove through the open gates and pulled up in front of the main building. She uncrossed her long legs and again looked out at the campus, which would be her home for however long she stayed. It could be worse she decided. The car door clicked and was pulled open. She slipped on her powder blue Chanel clogs and slung her Hermes Picotin Lock Bag over her shoulder. She walked towards the large oak doors and didn’t look back at the retreating car. Vivienne Khan pulled her long black hair into a high ponytail and pinned her side bangs back with a bobby pin. She always wore her silky hair styled down when she was out, but when she was alone she liked to get it out of her face. Her roommate Leila Hughes still wasn’t back from her family trip to Europe so she had the room to herself which she enjoyed. She was reaching for her copy of the Iliad when she heard a knock on the door. “What the hell” she muttered to herself “that is bothering me at fucking 11:00 at night”. She cracked the door and looked out. “Hey V” a familiar deep voice said. “ Blake!” she whispered happy but not wanting to alert her house mother two doors down of the presence of the 6 “2 170 lbs of unadulterated hotness . She grabbed his wrist and hurriedly pulled him inside. Once the door was closed she hugged him tight. “You’re back early! I thought you had to be in D.C until Tuesday.” My dad wanted me there but I got bored. He grinned down and her. “Besides I missed you”. She reddened “I missed you too. Won’t your dad be pissed though?”. “Probably” he said shrugging. Then without warning he scooped her up proceeded to carry her over to the bed. “Fuck you!” she said laughing. He sat down on her comforter and she settled comfortably in his lap. She was so tiny at 5’3 that even sitting up in his lap that the top of her head didn’t even reach his chin. She suddenly became self conscious remembering that her hair was completely tied back. She quickly pulled out the hair tie and bobby pin and ran her fingers through her hair. She turned around in his lap so that she was facing him and looked up at Blake Williams. His light brown hair fell slightly into his bright green eyes which were shaded by long lashes that were envied by every girl at Reynolds academy. He was built, but not in an over exaggerated way. Thanks to crew and soccer he had a gorgeous six pack that Vivienne loved to feel through his shirt. She smiled mischievously at him. “Leila’s not getting back until tomorrow afternoon so we have the room to ourselves.” He smiled back at her and lightly brushed away her hair gently cupping her face in his large hand. They held each other’s gaze for a second and then he kissed her. She shivered with happiness and excitement, she could just tell, this was going to be an excellent year. Sorry for the wait Ms. Brooks we weren’t expecting you until the morning. Milly looked up to see a young woman probably in her late 20’s with dark brown hair and an equally dark judgmental expression. “I got an early flight” Milly said apologetically though she really didn’t care about the inconvenience she had caused. The woman looked like a bitch. She got up and followed her down a hall way and into the room the woman gestured to. Mr. Wellsburg, the dean will see you now. Milly nodded her thanks and walked into the door which shut behind her. Inside at a desk sat a man probably in his mid 60’s with graying hair and a beard. He greeted her with a warm smile saying “miss brooks, sorry about the wait I was just enjoying a late dinner with friends when my secretary informed me of your arrival. My name is Henry Wellsburg. As the dean here I would like to welcome you to Reynolds academy. I hope that you will enjoy it here.” “Thank you” she said returning the smile “I am sure I will”. “Unfortunately most of your classmates are still on their summer break. The new term starts in four days on Thursday so most of the students return on Tuesday or Wednesday. There a yahoo just blocked out the curse word

My book! READ PLEAZ! little bit out of my book? Please tell me whether it's good or bad and PLEAZ be honest! My little girl wrote it and she thinks its okay. Email me at candyeyed104@yahoo.com if you want to read the first FULL chapter:) It was raining. It was freezing and all I was doing was studying, under a tree with a poncho on. I was so focused that I didn’t even think about how worried Lem might be. Then the next thing I know was hearing car tires screech and a bunch of people honking horns. Then, it was all a blur. When I arrived at the house, I first smelled the dew. Its odor smelled like wet dog, but I least we had it here. April was getting things out of the car. June was still in the car, shaking because she was nervous. July was doing her hair and September was yelling at her phone. Now, the first thing you might get in your head when you read this is that they’re my siblings, my answer to that is no. They were my cousins, but not my legal guardian. So, there I was smelling the dew and hearing the wind and trying to adapt to this new place. The only problem was, I didn’t want to adapt as the old Tory, and I wanted to be a different Tory. I had chosen about everything possible you could think of. Clothes, movies, colors, you name it. I was no longer the pitiful, crybaby Tory. I was someone I admired. I was planning my new life since I boarded the plane and left Lem. As soon as I stepped on the plane, I drew out a red notebook and wrote down every detail about the old Tory. I scanned it, and then did the opposite. For example, if I liked chicken as the old Tory I would love turkey as the new Tory. I sat down by a man, he smelled of strong cologne. He was wearing a tuxedo, his hair was slicked back and he was reading an article about fancy hotel rooms and how expensive some are. It must’ve been boring to him, because there on that very plane he slept. He snored, and worst of all talked in his sleep. He kept whispering this word: efficient. He was wearing cowboy boots, but I assumed they were more comfortable than his black, shiny shoes. I looked at him like he was a crazy guy, and then listened to the airplane music. You could either choose between country, classic, rock, pop and hip-hop. The old Tory would’ve chosen classical music over rock any day, but I wasn’t her anymore. The old Tory might have been terrified of planes, but I was fearless. The last time I heard Lem would be the time I became the new Tory. So, as soon as I heard her say a final goodbye, I took a wonderful first breath. The air was smooth, and smelled of many odors. Before the plane told us to buckle up, I was all confused about wear to sit. Tory would never been confused, but I was. The people looked at my ticket and pointed to a seat and I sat down there. When the flight began, I had my headphones on and I was too focused into the music to realize we were lifting off the ground and going in the sky. I was so quick; I was the first one off. Even though I wondered what the guy in the suit was going, I went inside the airport and I saw four faces that looked at me. With their eyes completely serious, their mouth quivering and their feet wobbling, I felt like I was being examined. I walked very slowly to them and the first thing I asked them wasn’t who they were. “Do you have any five size shoes? These are giving me blisters,” I smiled and that’s how they knew me as Tory. I was a happy Tory. “Yeah! Their red, the color you like? Lem sent me a whole list of things you dislike and like,” The girl was the tallest out of the four. She was the most energetic and her shoes looked like a giant would easily fit in them. Her eyes were green and a little bit of blue, her hair golden brown, as crispy as a saltine cracker. Her teeth had braces, the color orange. Her fingernails were painted orange, and the bow in her hair matched it. Her jeans were the exact same brand I was wearing. Her necklace said, “sand” and her shirt was a plain white tee. It nearly killed me to see her wear that, because she would definitely look better wearing her pajamas

I have read this in the book the truth of the lie. madeleine mccann. Its about a polish couple, anyone know ? undreds of statements continue to be gathered in Vila da Luz. All the people of the area are interviewed: resort employees, tourists, play leaders from the crèches, residents. Most of them will be of no use to us, but none must be neglected. From information from Sagres, we learn that an individual has been surprised on Mareta beach taking photos of several children and in particular of a little girl aged 4, blonde with blue eyes, who looks like Madeleine. It was the little girl's father who noticed him. This 40 year-old man, wearing glasses, tells the investigators that the photographer tried to kidnap his daughter in the afternoon of April 26th in Sagres. He allegedly then fled in a hired car with a woman in the passenger seat. The stranger did not look like a tourist; brown hair down to his collar, wearing cream-coloured trousers and jacket and shoes of a classic style. This report reminds us of the individual encountered by Jane Tanner in the streets of Vila da Luz on the evening of Madeleine's disappearance. Thanks to the father's composure, he managed to take a photograph of the vehicle. It's not very clear and does not allow us to make out the number plate, but we succeed, nonetheless, in finding the car. The car hire firm provides us with the identity of the driver. He is a forty-year-old Polish man, who is traveling with his wife. They arrived in Portugal on April 28th, from Berlin. At Faro airport, they hired a car and put up in an apartment in Budens, near Praia da Luz. Unfortunately, on May 5th, at 7am, they had already left, taking with them their camera and all the photos from their holiday. We ask the German police, through Interpol, to monitor them as soon as they arrive in Berlin. All the passengers are questioned, but no one has seen a child looking like Madeleine. In Berlin, the couple take the train to return to Poland. Thus, the Polish trail comes to an end. We would like to have seen their photos...but that proved impossible. A lead is only valuable in as far as it is followed to the end, which was not the case with this one. We will realise that we shouldn't have ruled it out so quickly, and that it is still a topic of interest. MORE LEADS, STILL NO RESULTS EDIT. on reading further it says polish police just checked if they had madeleine, but didnt take their cameras, it also stated the police said they are sure if this lead was followed, it might have uncovered a pedo ring. cant they still check those people now ? i just was goggling her anniversary and i came across it, i never heard this before , i will seng you full link skidoo, btw hows you lol http://thetruthaboutthelie.blogspot.com/2009/09/complete-book-on-one-page.html edit. feel the same but only came across it when i heard about this polish couple on a blog. you dont have to read all his book , it summarises most of it on 1 page. scroll further and it says what i copied, but its what shows up later, that they never even bothered to follow this lead, and he plays it down is just unreal.. THE POLISH TRAIL LEADS TO AN IMPASSE Sunday May 6th Meeting room. Seventy-two hours have gone by since the disappearance. We are going through a difficult time: in spite of the searches carried out on the ground and the considerable means deployed, we haven't found Madeleine. The day gets off to a difficult start with bad news from Poland. From all accounts, the police badly interpreted our request for collaboration; all they did was approach the couple and verify that Madeleine was not with them, but didn't seize either their photographic equipment or the photos taken during their holiday. Another lead that remains pending. Perhaps it would have led to the discovery of a paedophile ring. We are seeking to piece together the couple's itinerary, to find out if anyone noticed them in the vicinity of Praia da Luz, to establish any relationship between them and Maddie's disappearance. We circulate a photo - which we obtained thanks to a surveillance camera in a Lisbon shopping mall - a We are seeking to piece together the couple's itinerary, to find out if anyone noticed them in the vicinity of Praia da Luz, to establish any relationship between them and Maddie's disap. Nobody saw them. On the other hand, employees of the restaurant they usually went to, in the Burgau-Budens area, remember them: the woman was usually in a bad mood, and both wore clothes totally inappropriate to the place and the time of year. The forensic police won't be able to investigate their hire vehicle, which we managed to locate, because it has already been rented out again. All that's left to us is to find the bin in which the cleaning team dumped the rubbish left in the vehicle. Analyses of the rubbish reveals nothing. Fortunately, no one else has yet occupied the apartment the couple stayed in no LO , its says 44 y/o polish man, i just copied and pasted

Read the first chapter of this book!? It was raining. It was freezing and all I was doing was studying, under a tree with a poncho on. I was so focused that I didn’t even think about how worried Lem might be. Then the next thing I know was hearing car tires screech and a bunch of people honking horns. Then, it was all a blur. When I arrived at the house, I first smelled the dew. Its odor smelled like wet dog, but I least we had it here. April was getting things out of the car. June was still in the car, shaking because she was nervous. July was doing her hair and September was yelling at her phone. Now, the first thing you might get in your head when you read this is that they’re my siblings, my answer to that is no. They were my cousins, but not my legal guardian. So, there I was smelling the dew and hearing the wind and trying to adapt to this new place. The only problem was, I didn’t want to adapt as the old Tory, and I wanted to be a different Tory. I had chosen about everything possible you could think of. Clothes, movies, colors, you name it. I was no longer the pitiful, crybaby Tory. I was someone I admired. I was planning my new life since I boarded the plane and left Lem. As soon as I stepped on the plane, I drew out a red notebook and wrote down every detail about the old Tory. I scanned it, and then did the opposite. For example, if I liked chicken as the old Tory I would love turkey as the new Tory. I sat down by a man, he smelled of strong cologne. He was wearing a tuxedo, his hair was slicked back and he was reading an article about fancy hotel rooms and how expensive some are. It must’ve been boring to him, because there on that very plane he slept. He snored, and worst of all talked in his sleep. He kept whispering this word: efficient. He was wearing cowboy boots, but I assumed they were more comfortable than his black, shiny shoes. I looked at him like he was a crazy guy, and then listened to the airplane music. You could either choose between country, classic, rock, pop and hip-hop. The old Tory would’ve chosen classical music over rock any day, but I wasn’t her anymore. The old Tory might have been terrified of planes, but I was fearless. The last time I heard Lem would be the time I became the new Tory. So, as soon as I heard her say a final goodbye, I took a wonderful first breath. The air was smooth, and smelled of many odors. Before the plane told us to buckle up, I was all confused about wear to sit. Tory would never been confused, but I was. The people looked at my ticket and pointed to a seat and I sat down there. When the flight began, I had my headphones on and I was too focused into the music to realize we were lifting off the ground and going in the sky. I was so quick; I was the first one off. Even though I wondered what the guy in the suit was going, I went inside the airport and I saw four faces that looked at me. With their eyes completely serious, their mouth quivering and their feet wobbling, I felt like I was being examined. I walked very slowly to them and the first thing I asked them wasn’t who they were. “Do you have any five size shoes? These are giving me blisters,” I smiled and that’s how they knew me as Tory. I was a happy Tory. “Yeah! Their red, the color you like? Lem sent me a whole list of things you dislike and like,” The girl was the tallest out of the four. She was the most energetic and her shoes looked like a giant would easily fit in them. Her eyes were green and a little bit of blue, her hair golden brown, as crispy as a saltine cracker. Her teeth had braces, the color orange. Her fingernails were painted orange, and the bow in her hair matched it. Her jeans were the exact same brand I was wearing. Her necklace said, “sand” and her shirt was a plain white tee. It nearly killed me to see her wear that, because she would definitely look better wearing her pajamas. “Yeah, thanks,” she handed me a pair of red sneakers, the laces red as well. I liked them and when I slipped them on it felt like I was officially different. “Were going to shop for your school supplies. Do you want to come with us?” She was shorter than the girl who handed me the shoes. Her teeth were crooked, but white. Her hair was auburn, curly and looked very shiny. She wore a summer dress, which I personally though look like she had picked a punch of flowers and glued them on a dress. Even though her sandals were Sesame Street, I ignored them. “Sure,” I said, my voice unheard by all the ruckus. “Now,” the tallest girl said, taking my bags, “I’m April. I’m the oldest,” she smiled at me, but not as beautifully as last time. “When I heard your name was Tory, I nearly laughed myself to death. Because that was our dog! I’m June,” June seemed like the type that her hobby was laughed. She looked identical to April, so I asked her if she was April’s twin. “No, I’m just her sister that just looks exactly like her,” April said sarcastically. She swung her purse around and

survey for girls only ? 1. Edward Cullen or Jacob Black 2. Ac/Dc or Led Zeppelin 3. Blue or pink 4. myspace or face book 5. winter or summer 6. gold or silver 7. chris brown or lil wayne 8. classic cars or modern cars 9. milk chocolate or white chocolate 10. shopping or movies

List as much word as you possibly can? Please seperate each word by a comma. Thanks. ie. earphone,earphones,activism,advertising,alcohol,alternative-news,ancient-history,animals,animation,anime,architecture,arts,astronomy,atheist,bizarre,blogs,books,buddhism,business,cars,cartoons,cats,celebrities,christianity,classic-rock,clothing,comedy-movies,comics,computer-graphics,computer-hardware,computers,cooking,crafts,crime,cyberculture,dogs,drawing,drugs,ecommerce,environment,fashion,fine-arts,firefox,geography,graphic-design,guitar,guns,hacking,health,history,humor,illusions,interior-design,internet,internet-tools,iraq,liberal-politics,liberties,linguistics,linux,literature,mac-os,mathematics,movies,multimedia,music,nature,network-security,news,online-games,open-source,painting,philosophy,photography,physics,poetry,politics,programming,psychology,quizzes,relationships,religion,satire,science,science-fiction,self-improvement,shopping,software,space-exploration,stumblers,stumbleupon,tattoos,travel,video,video-games,web-design,windows,writing,actors,america,apple,art,aviation,blog,blogging,bush,california,car,cartoon,cat,celebrity,charity,children,climate-change,college,comedy,comic,community,dance,death,debate,design,diet,diy,dog,economy,election,elections,energy,entertainment,exercise,facebook,film,finance,flash,flowers,food,football,funny,gadgets,game,games,gaming,global-warming,god,google,graffiti,green,home,humour,illustration,images,internet-marketing,life,living,love,mac,marriage,math,media,medicine,microsoft,money,music-video,obama,oil,online,paintings,pakistan,peace,photo,photos,photoshop,pictures,pirates,president,quotes,recipe,recipes,republican,rock,sculpture,security,social-media,social-networking,society,space,star-wars,tech,technology,television,tips,tools,tutorials,ubuntu,vegan,video,videos,vintage,war,water,web,web-development,weird,wordpress,youtube,sex,sexy,hot,love,porn,president,2008,2009,winter,secret,omg,no,way,amplafitesttag,art,arts,bank,barackobama,bisexual,blues,broadway,business,canvass,children,classical,college,comedy,community,communityservice,concert,conference,convention,country,county,dance,debatewatchparty,design,development,drive,election,election08,entrepreneur,event,events,fair,family,festival,field,filmfest,florida,football,for,free,fun,fundraising,halloween,haunted,indie,iowavoteearlyforchangeweekofac,jazz,kids,league,live,local,localfieldoffice,london,management,marketing,media,meeting,music,musicals,mybo,national,networking,new,nfl,nyc,obama,office,organizing,party,performance,phone,phonebank,pop,pride,prideevent,pridefest,registration,rock,service,show,shows,social,sport,sports,startup,technology,theater,tour,voter,voterregistrationdrive,web,western,women,women for obama,workshop,free,money,cash,movie,download,wheels fast **** death kill almost element mike valley chad muska rodney mullen tony hawk transworld magazine ea game xbox360 pressure flip late fs shuvit ; siyoun spin ; fs varial heel-side pressure 1/2 flip late front foot 1/2 heelflip ; 360 flip ; 360 hospital flip ; no-comply impossible late flip ; bs 180 nollie back foot impossible ; nollie pressure 1/2 flip late back foot 1/2 flip bs body varial ; pressure flip late flip ; switch chef salad ; nollie fs shuvit underflip varial ; switch front foot impossible ; front foot impossible late shuvit ; switch 360 kiwi flip to pivot ; plasma spin revert ; fs varial heel-side pressure 1/2 flip late front foot 1/2 flip ; late back foot varial flip ; lala flip ; varial 1/2 kickflip late fs varial front foot 1/2 flip ; 1/2 heelflip late back foot 1/2 flip bs body varial ; nollie pressure 1/2 flip late varial back foot 1/2 flip ; no-comply 360 flip late back foot underflip ; nollie 540 kiwi flip ; fakie big spin underflip ; fakie fs varial heel-side pressure flip to pivot ; tinky-winky ; pressure 1/2 flip late front foot 1/2 flip fs body varial ; switch pressure 1/2 flip late front foot 1/2 flip fs body varial ; switch pop shove-it late flip fs body varial ; nollie shove-it late varial flip ; nollie fs shove-it late varial heelflip ; featherflip ; fs shuvit underflip ; fs impossible ; heelflip late bs shuvit ; nollie pop shove-it late fs shuvit ; switch plasma spin ; fs shuvit late flip ; switch late fs shuvit ; pop shove-it late fs shove-it ; switch 1/2 heel-side pressure flip late big spin nosecasperflip ; fakie fs varial heel-side pressure flip revert ; fs varial front foot underflip ; 1/2 heelflip late front foot 1/2 flip ; switch impossible revert ; nollie back foot impossible ; fs 180 front foot impossible ; nollie late flip ; nollie big spin late flip ; fakie big spin late flip ; nollie fs shuvit late flip ; bs heelflip to pivot ; switch 360 underflip fs body varial ; late flip ; fs 180 heel-side pressure flip ; nollie plasma spin ; plasma spin ; bs 360 nollie heelflip ; varial 1/2 kickflip late front foot 1/2 flip,car,boy,cold,socks,cell phone,bed,store,candy,book,school,locker,cereal,speaker,painting,computer,e-mail,grass,message,keyboard,knights,shield

You ever have a perfect, romantic night -- are in such a daze -- that you forget you're not with your wife? I am traveling to Buffalo on business by car (my classic El Camino) and had decided to take along my EF (Emotional Friend, about 21, female, completely platonic) because my wife takes no interest in my life or career, hates my car, and didn't want to go. I need an assistant, because this job is tricky -- and the drive is boring. (Have you ever been to upstate New York cow country?) Anyway, we pulled into Albany last night for a pit stop, all bleary-eyed, and I almost had to choke the clerk at Motel 6 because he kept insisting my EF reserved the hot-tub room with one bed, though I had seen her go online and book a room with two beds. This one was $19.99 more, to boot. I figured he was scamming us, but I was tired and relented. Well, we got in the room and it appears my EF did some research. See, I'd told her a while back that she looked just like the petite blond who was my girlfriend in high school, in the 80s, the last girlfriend I'd had before my wife. Anyway, we entered the room, and there were helium balloons everywhere -- in blue and yellow, my high school team color! She walked over to an old boom box and popped in a cassette -- a cassette! -- Shannon's "Let the Music Play." How did she know that was the tape my high school girlfriend left behind (in the El Camino)? In the mini-fridge were Olde English 40-ouncers, like we used to drink in high school, before they became "ghetto." How sweet, considering I went to a high school not far from Albany. She must've bribed the clerk to set up the room like this. After a few OE's with the EF, I started losing a sense of reality, and was so caught up in the mood and music -- and by this time the EF was wearing my varsity jacket (how'd she get that out of my attic, and get rid of the mothball smell?) along with (her) Liz Claiborne perfume -- that I looked into her eyes and thought I was in 1988, and it was the summer before I left for college, and had left my girlfriend behind. And in that unreality the EF became that girlfriend. And our eyes locked, and a moment seemed like over 20 years, and an alternate reality followed from there ... And a different house, and different kids, barking dogs and a white picket fence and growing old together, happy. You ever get caught up in a moment like that? Even though you're married, and your reality is already, sadly, set?

Guys: Why is okay to treat onw woman like**** and not another? SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY PLEASE. PLEASE READ ALL BEFORE RESPONDING AND DON'T SAY MEAN THINGS JUST TO RAZZ ME. YOU WILL BE IGNORED. I am happily married to a wonderful man, and pregnant with our first child. I have many good things in my life, but am haunted by a past relationship, because I don't understand why it happened the way it happened. Four years ago, I moved out of state to be with the man I thought was the one for me. He convinced me moving was the right decision for me, and I thought he loved me. He seemed like a terrific guy. However, within days of the move, he changed toward me. He gradually became very selfish, careless, mean and more critical than anyone I'v ever known. I ran myself ragged trying to make him happy but nothing worked. Over the almost two years we stayed together, his treatment of me got worse and worse, to the point of being abusive. He hit me in the face once for talking too loudly on my cell phone in the car, and afterward he didn't even realize he had hit me. He would pick fights over nothing, and then when I'd come around just to end the fight, he would argue with me for not thinking his way in the first place. Many of his criticisms and problems with me had to do with my physical appearance, and my basic personality. I'm a tall, light-skinned, blue-eyed, reddish-haired classic kind of beauty with a dancer's body. A lot of men (and sometimes women) find me attractive. Same with my personality. I'm a pretty likeable person. I feel I have to say that so people don't come on here and say, "Well...mayb e you're ugly Bi-atch." No. I'm not. I lot of guys wanted to date me, even while he and I were together. Some examples of things he said/did are: He advised me to take out a loan to buy myself a perkier pair of boobs. I didn't want to do it, but he "wanted me to do it if I wanted to do it, but why wouldn't I since I should want to look my best for him?" When I finally considered it, I told him "Fine but you're paying for them." He said, "Why should I pay? They're YOUR boobs." Only after this relationship ended did I discover, from being topless in front of other guys, that my boobs are normal for my size, and attractive even though they aren't "perfect" (whatever that means). When we went out together, he would spend the entire time observing me, and afterward he would criticize everything I did and said. I complimented someone's shoes once, and said she had "beautiful Cinderella feet." Then I made a joke about my size 9 feet. She took it as a compliment and we had a little girl-to-girl talk about shoes and shoe shopping. After that conversation, my ex pulled me aside and told me that was a weird thing to say, and "that girl probably thinks you're weird." He constantly complained about my complexion, and told me if I'd just try harder, I could get a tan. No. I had already had two precancerous lesions removed from my face from trying to tan. I told him the medical reasons why I needed to protect myself by wearing sunblock, yet he always gave me grief for having to put it on, acting like it was SUCH an imposition to wait five minutes while I reapplied. Once even hid it from me at the beach and told me I didn't need it. Of course, I burned that day. he also spread a rumor that I cheated on him after we broke up, and many of our mutual friends wouldn't speak to me when I went to see them a few years ago. I didn't cheat on him. I was broken hearted that the relationship was ending in flames! Even if I had, I feel he should have blamed his own darn self for being such an asshole and driving me to another man! It happens. If I were to list everything that happened, the list would fill a book. I know he was a jerk, and I now he wasn't worth my time (took me four years to figure that out). What I cannot understand is WHY he dated someone he didn't like in the first place? Why put me through that? MOST OF ALL: Why was okay for him to treat me like shit? What is it about me that made it okay for him to scapegoat all his issues onto me and hurt me like that? Was I perfect? Oh, heck no! But I wasn't abusive and purposely unkind to him, like he was to me. I wrote him and his family emails apologizing for my part in the hurt, ie. the fact that I developed a pretty serious rage problem toward him after a while. It was immature of me, but his nastiness took its toll, and I was young and hurting. What I really want is a face-to-face with him (and perhaps his mother, who was also rude and critical of me.) I want to ask them , him especially, why they felt it was okay to be so rude, mean, unkind, and cruel to me? Why was it okay to say things to me that are socially unacceptable things to say to someone? I want to know...do/did they treat his wife with that same cruelty? And if not....why no .....why not? Why me?

Guys: Why is it okay to treat one woman like shit, and then not another? SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY PLEASE. PLEASE READ ALL BEFORE RESPONDING AND DON'T SAY MEAN THINGS JUST TO RAZZ ME. YOU WILL BE IGNORED. I am happily married to a wonderful man, and pregnant with our first child. I have many good things in my life, but am haunted by a past relationship, because I don't understand why it happened the way it happened. Four years ago, I moved out of state to be with the man I thought was the one for me. He convinced me moving was the right decision for me, and I thought he loved me. He seemed like a terrific guy. However, within days of the move, he changed toward me. He gradually became very selfish, careless, mean and more critical than anyone I'v ever known. I ran myself ragged trying to make him happy but nothing worked. Over the almost two years we stayed together, his treatment of me got worse and worse, to the point of being abusive. He hit me in the face once for talking too loudly on my cell phone in the car, and afterward he didn't even realize he had hit me. He would pick fights over nothing, and then when I'd come around just to end the fight, he would argue with me for not thinking his way in the first place. Many of his criticisms and problems with me had to do with my physical appearance, and my basic personality. I'm a tall, light-skinned, blue-eyed, reddish-haired classic kind of beauty with a dancer's body. A lot of men (and sometimes women) find me attractive. Same with my personality. I'm a pretty likeable person. I feel I have to say that so people don't come on here and say, "Well...mayb e you're ugly Bi-atch." No. I'm not. I lot of guys wanted to date me, even while he and I were together. Some examples of things he said/did are: He advised me to take out a loan to buy myself a perkier pair of boobs. I didn't want to do it, but he "wanted me to do it if I wanted to do it, but why wouldn't I since I should want to look my best for him?" When I finally considered it, I told him "Fine but you're paying for them." He said, "Why should I pay? They're YOUR boobs." Only after this relationship ended did I discover, from being topless in front of other guys, that my boobs are normal for my size, and attractive even though they aren't "perfect" (whatever that means). When we went out together, he would spend the entire time observing me, and afterward he would criticize everything I did and said. I complimented someone's shoes once, and said she had "beautiful Cinderella feet." Then I made a joke about my size 9 feet. She took it as a compliment and we had a little girl-to-girl talk about shoes and shoe shopping. After that conversation, my ex pulled me aside and told me that was a weird thing to say, and "that girl probably thinks you're weird." He constantly complained about my complexion, and told me if I'd just try harder, I could get a tan. No. I had already had two precancerous lesions removed from my face from trying to tan. I told him the medical reasons why I needed to protect myself by wearing sunblock, yet he always gave me grief for having to put it on, acting like it was SUCH an imposition to wait five minutes while I reapplied. Once even hid it from me at the beach and told me I didn't need it. Of course, I burned that day. he also spread a rumor that I cheated on him after we broke up, and many of our mutual friends wouldn't speak to me when I went to see them a few years ago. I didn't cheat on him. I was broken hearted that the relationship was ending in flames! Even if I had, I feel he should have blamed his own darn self for being such an asshole and driving me to another man! It happens. If I were to list everything that happened, the list would fill a book. I know he was a jerk, and I now he wasn't worth my time (took me four years to figure that out). What I cannot understand is WHY he dated someone he didn't like in the first place? Why put me through that? MOST OF ALL: Why was okay for him to treat me like shit? What is it about me that made it okay for him to scapegoat all his issues onto me and hurt me like that? Was I perfect? Oh, heck no! But I wasn't abusive and purposely unkind to him, like he was to me. I wrote him and his family emails apologizing for my part in the hurt, ie. the fact that I developed a pretty serious rage problem toward him after a while. It was immature of me, but his nastiness took its toll, and I was young and hurting. What I really want is a face-to-face with him (and perhaps his mother, who was also rude and critical of me.) I want to ask them , him especially, why they felt it was okay to be so rude, mean, unkind, and cruel to me? Why was it okay to say things to me that are socially unacceptable things to say to someone? I mean, really...what did I do? I tried my best to be a good person, and to show love in ......I tried my best to be a good person, and to show love in every way I could. I want to know...do/did they treat his wife with that same cruelty? And if not....why not? Why me?

I Need Useless Tags for a Video Related to UFOs, anybody have any? You know what i mean? activism, advertising, alcohol, alternative-news, ancient-history, animals, animation, anime, architecture, arts, astronomy, atheist, bizarre, blogs, books, buddhism, business, cars, cartoons, cats, celebrities, christianity, classic-rock, clothing, comedy-movies, comics, computer-graphics, computer-hardware, computers, cooking, crafts, crime, cyberculture, dogs, drawing, drugs, ecommerce, environment, fashion, fine-arts, firefox, geography, graphic-design, guitar, guns, hacking, health, history, humor, illusions, interior-design, internet, internet-tools, iraq, liberal-politics, liberties, linguistics, linux, literature, mac-os, mathematics, movies, multimedia, music, nature, network-security, news, online-games, open-source, painting, philosophy, photography, physics, poetry, politics, programming, psychology, quizzes, relationships, religion, satire, science, science-fiction, self-improvement, shopping, software, space-exploration, stumblers, stumbleupon, tattoos, travel, tv, video, video-games, web-design, windows, writing, actors, america, apple, art, aviation, blog, blogging, bush, california, car, cartoon, cat, celebrity, charity, children, climate-change, college, comedy, comic, community, dance, death, debate, design, diet, diy, dog, economy, election, elections, energy, entertainment, exercise, facebook, film, finance, flash, flowers, food, football, funny, gadgets, game, games, gaming, global-warming, god, google, graffiti, green, home, humour, illustration, images, internet-marketing, life, living, love, mac, marriage, math, media, medicine, microsoft, money, music-video, obama, oil, online, paintings, pakistan, peace, photo, photos, photoshop, pictures, pirates, president, quotes, recipe, recipes, republican, rock, sculpture, security, social-media, social-networking, society, space, star-wars, tech, technology, television, tips, tools, tutorials, ubuntu, vegan, video, videos, vintage, war, water, web, web-development, weird, wordpress, youtube, sex, sexy, hot, love, porn, president, 2008, 2009, winter, secret, omg, no, way, amplafitesttag, art, arts, bank, barackobama, bi, bisexual, blues, broadway, business, c, canvass, children, classical, college, comedy, community, communityservice, concert, conference, convention, country, county, dance, debatewatchparty, design, development, drive, election, election08, entrepreneur, event, events, fair, family, festival, field, filmfest, florida, football, for, free, fun, fundraising, halloween, haunted, indie, iowavoteearlyforchangeweekofac, jazz, kids, league, live, local, localfieldoffice, london, management, marketing, media, meeting, music, musicals, mybo, national, networking, new, nfl, nyc, obama, of, office, organizing, party, performance, phone, phonebank, pop, pride, prideevent, pridefest, registration, rock, service, show, shows, social, sport, sports, startup, technology, theater, tour, voter, voterregistrationdrive, w, web, western, women, women for obama, workshop, , free, money, cash, movie, download Something like that but maybe related to aliens ufos and space? Thanks I really appreciate the help

DO You LIKE IT??????????????????????????? bascally im trying to write a book like gossip girl/the a -list/ the clique but with a horror twist :p only girls will like this “Miss we’ve arrived”. Milly brooks averted her eyes from her dog eared copy of othello and looked out of the tinted windows of the black range rover. A large wrought iron gate stared back, behind which classic victorian style buildings made up the campus of Reynold academy. As they drew near to the gate a female voice announced “ name please” “Brooks” her driver declared. “ Oh I see” the voice stiffened. “ Welcome to the academy Ms. Brooks” the gates opened. Milly sighed. Ever since the incident she’d become accustomed to hearing that tone from almost everyone. The shocked judgemental slightly scared voice that everyone used when they heard her name or found out who she was. She guessed she would be hearing it just as much at this school as she had at the others. She honestly didn’t know what her uncle thought would be different about this school, they really were all the same. The car drove through the open gates and pulled up in front of the main building. She uncrossed her long legs and again looked out at the campus, which would be her home for however long she stayed. It could be worse she decided. The car door clicked and was pulled open. She slipped on her powder blue chanel clogs and slung her Hermes Picotin Lock Bag over her shoulder. She walked towards the large oak doors and didn’t look back at the retreating car. Vivienne Khan pulled her long black hair into a high ponytail and pinned her side bangs back with a bobby pin. She always wore her silky hair styled down when she was out, but when she was alone she liked to get it out of her face. Her room mate Leila hughes still wasn’t back from her family trip to euroup so she had the room to herself which she enjoyed. She was reaching for her copy of the iliad when she heard a knock on the door. “What the hell” she muttered to herself “ who is bothering me at fucking 11:00 at night”. She cracked the door and looked out. “Hey V” a farmiliar deep voice said. “ blake!” she whispered happy but not wanting to alert her house mother two doors down of the presence of her 6 “2 incredibly hot boy friend. She grabbed his wrist and hurridly pulled him inside. Once the door was closed She hugged him tight. “ Your back early! I thought you had to be in D.C until Tuesday.” My dad wanted me there but I got bored. He grinned down and her. “Besides I missed you”. She reddened “ I missed you too. Won’t your dad be pissed though?” . “Probably” he said shrugging. Then without warning he scooped her up proceded to carry her over to the bed. “ fuck you!” she said laughing. He sat down on her comforter and she settled comfortably in his lap. She was so tiny at 5’3 that even sitting up in his lap that the top of her head didn’t even reach his chin. She suddenly became self conscious remembering that her hair was completely tied back. She quikly pulled out the hair tie and bobby pin and ran her fingers through her hair. She turned around in his lap so that she was facing him and looked up at Blake Williams. His light brown hair fell slightly into his bright green eyes which were shaded by long lashes that were envied by every girl at reynold academy. He was built, but not in an over exaggerated way. Thanks to crew and soccer he had a gorgeous six pack that Vivienne loved to feel through his shirt. She smiled mischeviously at him. “Leilas not getting back until tomorrow afternoon so we have the room to ourselves.” He smiled back at her and lightly brushed away her hair gently cupping her face in his large hand. They held each others gaze for a second and then he kissed her. She shivered with happiness and excitement, she could just tell, this was going to be an excellent year. Sorry for the wait Ms. Brooks we weren’t expecting you until the morning. Milly looked up to see a young woman probably in her late 20’s with dark brown hair and an equally dark judgmental expression. “I got an early flight” Milly said apologetically though she really didn’t care about the inconvenience she had caused. The woman looked like a bitch. She got up and followed her down a hall way and into the room the woman gestured to. Mr. Willsburg, the dean will see you now. Milly nodded her thanks and walked into the door which shut behind her. Inside at a desk sat a man probably in his mid 60’s with graying hair and a beard. He greeted her with a warm smile saying “ miss brooks, sorry about the wait I was just enjoying a late dinner with friends when my secretary informed me of your arrival. My name is henry willsberg. As the dean here I would like to welcome you to Reynolds academy. I hope that you will enjoy it here.” “Thankyou” she said returning the smile “ I am sure I will”. “Unforutaly most of your classmates are still on their summer break. The new term starts in four days on Thursday

How am i?????????????????? SO im trying to write a book - think gossip girl with a horror twist - http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2822683/1/Bloody_Kisses_Chapter_1 “Miss we’ve arrived”. Milly brooks averted her eyes from her dog eared copy of Othello and looked out of the tinted windows of the black range rover. A large wrought iron gate stared back, behind which classic Victorian style buildings made up the campus of Reynolds academy. As they drew near to the gate a female voice announced “name please” “Brooks” her driver declared. “Oh I see” the voice stiffened. “Welcome to the academy Ms. Brooks” the gates opened. Milly sighed. Ever since the incident she’d become accustomed to hearing that tone from almost everyone. The shocked judgmental slightly scared voice that everyone used when they heard her name or found out who she was. She guessed she would be hearing it just as much at this school as she had at the others. She honestly didn’t know what her uncle thought would be different about this school; they really were all the same. The car drove through the open gates and pulled up in front of the main building. She uncrossed her long legs and again looked out at the campus, which would be her home for however long she stayed. It could be worse she decided. The car door clicked and was pulled open. She slipped on her powder blue Chanel clogs and slung her Hermes Picotin Lock Bag over her shoulder. She walked towards the large oak doors and didn’t look back at the retreating car. Vivienne Khan pulled her long black hair into a high ponytail and pinned her side bangs back with a bobby pin. She always wore her silky hair styled down when she was out, but when she was alone she liked to get it out of her face. Her roommate Leila Hughes still wasn’t back from her family trip to Europe so she had the room to herself which she enjoyed. She was reaching for her copy of the Iliad when she heard a knock on the door. “What the hell” she muttered to herself “that is bothering me at fucking 11:00 at night”. She cracked the door and looked out. “Hey V” a familiar deep voice said. “ Blake!” she whispered happy but not wanting to alert her house mother two doors down of the presence of the 6 “2 170 lbs of unadulterated hotness . She grabbed his wrist and hurriedly pulled him inside. Once the door was closed she hugged him tight. “You’re back early! I thought you had to be in D.C until Tuesday.” My dad wanted me there but I got bored. He grinned down and her. “Besides I missed you”. She reddened “I missed you too. Won’t your dad be pissed though?”. “Probably” he said shrugging. Then without warning he scooped her up proceeded to carry her over to the bed. “Fuck you!” she said laughing. He sat down on her comforter and she settled comfortably in his lap. She was so tiny at 5’3 that even sitting up in his lap that the top of her head didn’t even reach his chin. She suddenly became self conscious remembering that her hair was completely tied back. She quickly pulled out the hair tie and bobby pin and ran her fingers through her hair. She turned around in his lap so that she was facing him and looked up at Blake Williams. His light brown hair fell slightly into his bright green eyes which were shaded by long lashes that were envied by every girl at Reynolds academy. He was built, but not in an over exaggerated way. Thanks to crew and soccer he had a gorgeous six pack that Vivienne loved to feel through his shirt. She smiled mischievously at him. “Leila’s not getting back until tomorrow afternoon so we have the room to ourselves.” He smiled back at her and lightly brushed away her hair gently cupping her face in his large hand. They held each other’s gaze for a second and then he kissed her. She shivered with happiness and excitement, she could just tell, this was going to be an excellent year. Sorry for the wait Ms. Brooks we weren’t expecting you until the morning. Milly looked up to see a young woman probably in her late 20’s with dark brown hair and an equally dark judgmental expression. “I got an early flight” Milly said apologetically though she really didn’t care about the inconvenience she had caused. The woman looked like a bitch. She got up and followed her down a hall way and into the room the woman gestured to. Mr. Wellsburg, the dean will see you now. Milly nodded her thanks and walked into the door which shut behind her. Inside at a desk sat a man probably in his mid 60’s with graying hair and a beard. He greeted her with a warm smile saying “miss brooks, sorry about the wait I was just enjoying a late dinner with friends when my secretary informed me of your arrival. My name is Henry Wellsburg. As the dean here I would like to welcome you to Reynolds academy. I hope that you will enjoy it here.” “Thank you” she said returning the smile “I am sure I will”. “Unfortunately most of your classmates are still on their summer break. The new term starts in four days on Th

What names would you choose? Hush, darlings. Here's a BNG for you... Mainly for girls. 1.) Your name is [ 1 ] _____ ______ _____ and you have just turned twenty years old. You are in college studying Nursing, and one day while you're at the library, you come across a very handsome man. He has thick brown hair, deep brown eyes, and a wide smile that makes your knees go weak. You soon learn that his name is [ 2 ] _____ _____ and that he is twenty-three years old. Soon you two are dancing and laughing at your dream wedding, and you're happy and content with your lives. 2.) You both come from large families, and are excited when you learn that you're pregnant two years later. Something in your gut (And it's not the baby) tells you to go out and get some boy clothes. When you come back from the doctor, you both are shocked to learn you're expecting a girl. Looking for a classic first name and modern middle name. The weekend after Thanksgiving, you give birth to a wonderful, blue eyed baby girl with dark brown hair like her father. You name her [ 3 ] ______ _____ _____. 3.) When your daughter is about half a year, you're suprised to learn that you're pregnant again! This time, both you and husband get more than what you're expecting with twin boys! You choose two names that match together, are both unisex, and begin with the same letter. One of your sons middle names is Kane. His brother has a middle name with the exact same first inital. They're born with your white-blonde hair and their daddy's brown eyes. You name them [ 4 ] _____ ______ and [ 5 ] ______ ______. 4.) On your daughter's third birthday your mother gets her a puppy! A dalmation puppy, your daughter comes up with a cute animal (one that isn't a dog) name for the new edition to the family. She names it [ 6 ] ______. Following your new canine friend comes a baby boy with deep brown eyes and dark brown hair! A perfect replica of his daddy, you and your husband decided to give him to same name as his grandfather, with your husbands first name as his middle name. You name your newest son [ 7 ] ________ ________. 5.) You don't expect to have anymore children for a very long time. But, like most things, it doesn't go your way. You get pregnant again with a baby girl. She has your husbands dark hair and your beautiful blue eyes. She is absolutely gorgeous. You decided to give her a unique and simple name. She is named after either a plant, character from a book, or a family member. You name her [ 8 ] _______ ______. 6.) Your oldest daughter is now 5, the twins are 4 1/2, your youngest son is now 2 1/2, and your newest daughter has just celebrated her first birthday. Things are hectic in your home, and you do whatever is necessary to keep from having another member of the family added. Fate wanting otherwise, you eldest daughter's dalmation gets hit by a car. All the children are devastated, as well as you and your husband. You feel obligated to give them a gift, so adopt a mutt from the pound named [ 9 ] ______. 7.) Fifteen years later, you're driving your youngest daughter, who is sixteen, to the doctors office for birth control. When your oldest daughter, who is now twenty, calls, you are excited to learn that you're about to be a grandmother! You're daughter asks you to help with choosing a name, and you both decide to call the red-haired and green eyed girl [ 10 ] _______ ______ _______. Thanks. Hope you enjoyed. Sorry there are no pictures.

who whats to take a quick test and see how observant you REALLY are? please let me know if you like the quiz ans what ya made!! lol thanks! and HAVE FUNN!!!! LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. The average person only gets 7 correct. This is based on U.S. info, so use all lobes of your brain. This can be more difficult than it looks - it just shows how little most of us really see! There are 25 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. How many can you get right? No cheating! No looking around! No getting out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer! Can you beat 23?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers as you go. Check answers (on the bottom), AFTER completing all the questions. REMEMBER - NO CHEATING!!! BE HONEST!!! That means no looking at your phone or anything on your desk... Here we go! 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? (Don't you dare get up to see!) 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 10 . Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? 14. Which way do fans rotate? 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? 20. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? Scroll down to get your answers...... * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ANSWERS 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? BOTTOM 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 50 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? RIGHT 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? BLUE, RED, WHITE, YELLOW, BLACK & GOLD 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 1, 0 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? RIGHT 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 20 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? RED 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 88 10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? CLOCKWISE (NORTH OF THE EQUATOR) 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? TOWARDS BOTTOM RIGHT 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 12 (no #1) 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? LEFT 14. Which way do fans rotate? CLOCKWISE AS YOU LOOK AT IT 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 8 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? LEFT 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 5 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 6 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? BASHFUL 20. How many h ot dog buns are in a standard package? 8 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? ACE OF SPADES 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the o peni ng between the slats? LEFT 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? *, # 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 3 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? COUNTER

here a quick test to see how observant you are! (I wanna know you got and what you put please.)? LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. The average person only gets 7 correct. This is based on U.S. info, so use all lobes of your brain. This can be more difficult than it looks - it just shows how little most of us really see! There are 25 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. How many can you get right? No cheating! No looking around! No getting out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer! Can you beat 23?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers as you go. Check answers (on the bottom), AFTER completing all the questions. REMEMBER - NO CHEATING!!! BE HONEST!!! That means no looking at your phone or anything on your desk... Here we go! 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? (Don't you dare get up to see!) 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 10 . Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? 14. Which way do fans rotate? 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? 20. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? Scroll down to get your answers...... * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ANSWERS 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? BOTTOM 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 50 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? RIGHT 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? BLUE, RED, WHITE, YELLOW, BLACK & GOLD 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 1, 0 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? RIGHT 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 20 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? RED 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 88 10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? CLOCKWISE (NORTH OF THE EQUATOR) 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? TOWARDS BOTTOM RIGHT 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 12 (no #1) 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? LEFT 14. Which way do fans rotate? CLOCKWISE AS YOU LOOK AT IT 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 8 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? LEFT 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 5 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 6 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? BASHFUL 20. How many h ot dog buns are in a standard package? 8 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? ACE OF SPADES 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the o peni ng between the slats? LEFT 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? *, # 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 3 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? COUNTER

Here a quick test to see how observant you are! (I wanna know you got and what you put please.)? LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. The average person only gets 7 correct. This is based on U.S. info, so use all lobes of your brain. This can be more difficult than it looks - it just shows how little most of us really see! There are 25 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. How many can you get right? No cheating! No looking around! No getting out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer! Can you beat 23?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers as you go. Check answers (on the bottom), AFTER completing all the questions. REMEMBER - NO CHEATING!!! BE HONEST!!! That means no looking at your phone or anything on your desk... Here we go! 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? (Don't you dare get up to see!) 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 10 . Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? 14. Which way do fans rotate? 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? 20. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? Scroll down to get your answers...... * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ANSWERS 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? BOTTOM 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 50 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? RIGHT 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? BLUE, RED, WHITE, YELLOW, BLACK & GOLD 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 1, 0 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? RIGHT 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 20 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? RED 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 88 10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? CLOCKWISE (NORTH OF THE EQUATOR) 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? TOWARDS BOTTOM RIGHT 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 12 (no #1) 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? LEFT 14. Which way do fans rotate? CLOCKWISE AS YOU LOOK AT IT 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 8 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? LEFT 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 5 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 6 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? BASHFUL 20. How many h ot dog buns are in a standard package? 8 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? ACE OF SPADES 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the o peni ng between the slats? LEFT 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? *, # 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 3 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? COUNTER

How observant are you? LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. The average person only gets 7 correct. This is based on U.S. info, so use all lobes of your brain. This can be more difficult than it looks - it just shows how little most of us really see! There are 25 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. How many can you get right? No cheating! No looking around! No getting out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer! Can you beat 23?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers as you go. Check answers (on the bottom), AFTER completing all the questions. REMEMBER - NO CHEATING!!! BE HONEST!!! That means no looking at your phone or anything on your desk... Here we go! 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? (Don't you dare get up to see!) 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 10 . Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? 14. Which way do fans rotate? 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? 20. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? Scroll down to get your answers...... * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ANSWERS 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? BOTTOM 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 50 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? RIGHT 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? BLUE, RED, WHITE, YELLOW, BLACK & GOLD 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 1, 0 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? RIGHT 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 20 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? RED 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 88 10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? CLOCKWISE (NORTH OF THE EQUATOR) 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? TOWARDS BOTTOM RIGHT 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 12 (no #1) 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? LEFT 14. Which way do fans rotate? CLOCKWISE AS YOU LOOK AT IT 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 8 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? LEFT 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 5 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 6 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? BASHFUL 20. How many h ot dog buns are in a standard package? 8 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? ACE OF SPADES 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the o peni ng between the slats? LEFT 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? *, # 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 3 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? COUNTER 1 year ago Report It the credit for this goes to ... loverlifesrealmagi

Can you please give me feedback on this piece??? Please read everything! give good and bad points please!? How could this happen? Dana’s life would have been perfect. Her hobby, being home schooled, and everything else. She missed her books, her hair, her mom, and Gwen! Her mom was always commenting on how Dana’s eyes sparkled when she read. If only she could have known this would happen. Then everything would have been okay, she could have brought some books and said goodbye. How would she ever get home? Did the old her disappear or was the she was now in her place? So what was happening in this person’s life? Her name was Josephine and there was something about her going to America? Dana just could not remember. Someone calling her interrupted Dana’s thinking. “Jo! Get up or we’ll be late!” A minute later, a young man walked into the room. His dark hair was cut short and close to his head, his dull blue eyes were like the ocean before a storm. “Where are we going?” Josephine asked. “We have to be in Queenstown by 3:00PM.” He answered. “What ship are we traveling on?” “We are traveling on the RMS Titanic. She is supposedly unsinkable. I bought 2nd class tickets. I heard even the 3rd class accommodations are grand.” “Did you say Titanic?” “Yes. I call Betsy to help you dress.” he said“, Betsy!” A young girl scurried into the room. She looked around 14 or 15. She had beautiful hair. It was the classic red-brown hair of an Irish person. She wore a plain brown dress with a white apron over. Betsy picked up a corset and put it close to where Jo was standing. Betsy stood behind Jo as she unbuttoned her nightgown. It was loose fitting and soon slid off Jo’s shoulders. Betsy picked up the corset, Jo stepped into it, and the maid soon started to tighten it until Jo thought she couldn’t breathe. Next, the maid picked up a beautiful green silk dress with layers of white lace. Dana put the dress on and Betsy buttoned the back. Betsy was now combing my fiery red hair hair. As she tugged hard to get the brush through my curly hair. The she coiled it and stuck in a butterfly comb. She left me to put on my own shoes; I slipped on white high shoes. I was kneeling next to my trunk for clothes and other things. Then I opened up the lid to have a light fragrance of lavender come out. I pushed the clothes on top to reveal stacks of books. “Jo, come out now we have to go!” The young man called. “I’ll be right out.” I called. I hurried toward the doorway where the young man stood. He lead my out to a black shiny automobile. The driver opened the and stuck out a hand to help my in. I stepped inside and sat down on the black leather seat facing the sliding window. My brother sat down next to my and the driver closed the door and got in the drivers seat, blocking my view out the sliding window in front of me. The automobile started with a lot of noise and we were on the dusty road toward the city of Queenstown, Ireland. With the excitement of going toward the vast open Atlantic Ocean, I had forgotten the corset, which now was having a large affect on my breathing. Soon the automobile was close enough to the Ocean to smell the clean salty air. That wonderful smell was soon covered by the smells of the city. Everywhere there was noise, dust, and automobile exhaust. People were yelling and shouting. Then I saw the famous ship, the RMS Titanic, all the din of the city was covered by the grandness of Titanic. It really was amazing. I was surprised to think that it would soon be in the icy Atlantic. The automobile had now stopped and the driver opened the door and my brother was greeted by, “Your destination, Mr. Scully.” The driver said proudly, for making good time. My brother held out his hand to help my out of the car. The entire time all I thought about was the fact that Titanic would sink, and I would be on it. A man came up and asked for my brother to go check in the luggage. My brother responded my saying, “If you would be so kind as to do that for me it would be wonderful,” then he slipped a ten dollar bill into the man’s gloved hand. keep in mind it was written by a teenager

Who whats to take a quick test and see how observant you REALLY are? please let me know if you like the quiz ans what ya made!! lol thanks! and HAVE FUNN!!!! LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. The average person only gets 7 correct. This is based on U.S. info, so use all lobes of your brain. This can be more difficult than it looks - it just shows how little most of us really see! There are 25 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. How many can you get right? No cheating! No looking around! No getting out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer! Can you beat 23?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers as you go. Check answers (on the bottom), AFTER completing all the questions. REMEMBER - NO CHEATING!!! BE HONEST!!! That means no looking at your phone or anything on your desk... Here we go! 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? (Don't you dare get up to see!) 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 10 . Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 11. Which way does a no smoking sign's slash run? 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? 14. Which way do fans rotate? 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? 20. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? Scroll down to get your answers...... * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ANSWERS 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? BOTTOM 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 50 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? RIGHT 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? BLUE, RED, WHITE, YELLOW, BLACK & GOLD 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 1, 0 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? RIGHT 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 20 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? RED 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 88 10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? CLOCKWISE (NORTH OF THE EQUATOR) 11. Which way does a no smoking sign's slash run? TOWARDS BOTTOM RIGHT 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 12 (no #1) 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? LEFT 14. Which way do fans rotate? CLOCKWISE AS YOU LOOK AT IT 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 8 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? LEFT 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 5 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 6 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? BASHFUL 20. How many h ot dog buns are in a standard package? 8 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? ACE OF SPADES 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the o peni ng between the slats? LEFT 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? *, # 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 3 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? COUNTER

Common Knowledge Questions? There are 29 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. (the answers are below, but I know that you wouldn't cheat by peeking. Would you?) 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2. How many states are there? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? 5. What two letters don't appear on the telephone dial? (No cheating!) 6. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 7. When you walk does your left arm swing w/your right or left leg? 8. How many matches are in a standard pack? 9. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 10. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 11. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 12. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? 13. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 14. Which side of a women's blouse are the buttons on? 15. On a NY license plate, is New York on the top or bottom? 16. Which way do fans rotate as you look at them? 17. Whose face is on a dime? 18. How many sides does a stop sign have? 19. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 20. How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 21. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 22. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? 23. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 24. On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? 25. On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the angle of the space between the slats? 26. On the back of a $1 bill, what is in the center? 27. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 28. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 29. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? Answers 1. Bottom 2. 50 (please tell me you got this one!) 3. Right 4. Blue, red, white, yellow, black, &gold 5. Q, Z 6. 1, 0 7. Right 8. 20 9. Red 10. 88 11. Counter (north of the equator) 12. Towards bottom right 13. 12 (no #1) 14. Left 15. Top 16. Clockwise 17. Roosevelt 18. 8 19. Left 20. 5 21. 6 22. Bashful 23. 8 24. Ace of spades 25. Left 26. ONE 27. *, # 28. 3 29. Counter

Fun Power Observation Questions>>Easy Ten Points!!? The following 25 questions are about things we see every day or have known about all our lives how many can you get right? These little simple questions are harder than you—it just shows you how little we pay attention to the commonplace things of life. Put your thinking caps on. No cheating! No looking around! No getting out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer!! 1>On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2>How many states are there in the USA (don’t laugh, some people don’t know)? 3>In which hand is the statue of liberty’s torch? 4>What six colors are on the classic Campbell’s soup label? Gray, red, white, yellow, black and gold Blue, red, white, yellow, black and gold Blue, red, white, yellow, green, black and gold 5>What 2 numbers on the telephone dial don’t have letters by them? 6>When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg (Don’t you dare get up to see!)? 7>How many matches are in a standard pack? 8>On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 9>What is the lowest whole number on the FM dial? 10>Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 11>Which way does a “No Smoking” sign’s slash run? 12>How many channels on a VHF television dial? 13>On which side of a women’s blouse are the buttons? 14>Which way do fans rotate? 15>How many sides does a stop sign have? 16>Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 17>How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 18>How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 19>Sleepy, happy, sneezy, grumpy, doepy, doc. Who’s missing? 20>How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 21>On which playing card is the card maker’s trademark? 22>On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? 23>There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 24>How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 25>Does a merry go round turn counter or clockwise?

Who whats to take a quick test and see how observant you REALLY are? please let me know if you like the quiz ans what ya made!! lol thanks! and HAVE FUNN!!!! LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. The average person only gets 7 correct. This is based on U.S. info, so use all lobes of your brain. This can be more difficult than it looks - it just shows how little most of us really see! There are 25 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. How many can you get right? No cheating! No looking around! No getting out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer! Can you beat 23?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers as you go. Check answers (on the bottom), AFTER completing all the questions. REMEMBER - NO CHEATING!!! BE HONEST!!! That means no looking at your phone or anything on your desk... Here we go! 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? (Don't you dare get up to see!) 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 10 . Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 11. Which way does a no smoking sign's slash run? 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? 14. Which way do fans rotate? 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? 20. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? Scroll down to get your answers...... * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ANSWERS 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? BOTTOM 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 50 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? RIGHT 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? BLUE, RED, WHITE, YELLOW, BLACK & GOLD 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 1, 0 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? RIGHT 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 20 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? RED 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 88 10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? CLOCKWISE (NORTH OF THE EQUATOR) 11. Which way does a no smoking sign's slash run? TOWARDS BOTTOM RIGHT 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 12 (no #1) 13 On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? LEFT 14. Which way do fans rotate? CLOCKWISE AS YOU LOOK AT IT 15 How many sides does a stop sign have? 8 16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? LEFT 17 How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 5 18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 6 19. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? BASHFUL 20. How many h ot dog buns are in a standard package? 8 21 On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? ACE OF SPADES 22 On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the o peni ng between the slats? LEFT 23. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? *, # 24. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 3 25. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? COUNTER

HOW SMART ARE YOU?? wanna play?? cont. ((useless facts))? Write down your answers to check them at the end. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? How many states are there? In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? What 6 colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? What 2 letters don't appear on the telephone dial? What 2 #'s on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? When you walk does your left arm swing w/ your right or left leg? How many matches are in a standard pack? On our flag, is the top stripe red or white? What is the lowest # on the FM dial? Which way does water go down the drain, clockwise or counter-clockwise? Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? How many channels on a VHF TV dial? Which side of a woman's blouse are the buttons on? On a NY license plate, is New York on the top or bottom? Which way do fans rotate? Whose face is on a dime? How many sides does a stop sign have? Do books have even # pages on the right or left side? How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? How many sides are there on a standard pencil? Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? On which card in a deck, is the cardmaker's trademark? On which side of a venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? On the back of a $1 bill, what is in the center? There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? How many curves are in a standard paper clip? Does a merry-go-round turn clockwise or counter-clockwise? Answers: Bottom 50 Right Blue, red, white, yellow, black, and gold Q, Z 1, 0 Left 20 Red 88 Counter-clockwise (unless you happen to be south of the equator) Towards the bottom right 12 (no #1) Left Top Clockwise as you look at it Roosevelt 8 Left 5 6 Bashful 8 Ace of spades Left ONE *, # 3 Counter-clockwise Scoring: 30-28 Genius...Mensa is calling! 25-27 Not too shabby! 20-24 You could do better! 16-19 McDonald's is calling! 15 or below.. Being blind wouldn't affect you one bit!! http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070802164320AAFBOt1&r=w "cmpr" your probably right....I'll do that next time

Do you think these are good trivia questions? The average person only gets 7 right. This is based on> U.S. & CDN info, so use all lobes of your brain. This can be more difficult than it looks-it just shows how little most of us really see! There are 27 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. How many can you get right? These little simple questions are harder than you think-it just shows you how little we pay attention to the common place things of life. Put your thinking cap on. No cheating! No looking around! No getting out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer! Can you beat 20?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers and then check your answers (on the bottom) only AFTER completing all the questions. REMEMBER - NO CHEATING!!! -- BE HONEST!!! That means no looking at your phone or anything on your desk...Then, before you pass this on to your friends, change the number on the subject line to show how many you got correct. Forward to your friends and also back to the one who sent it to you. LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. Here we go! 1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom? 2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't know) 3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch? 4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label? 5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them? 6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg? 7. How many matches are in a standard pack? 8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white? 9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial? 10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise? 11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run? 12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial? 13. On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons? 14. Which way do fans rotate? 15. What is on the back of a Canadian dime? 16. How many sides does a stop sign have? 17. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side? 18. How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel? 19. How many sides are there on a standard pencil? 20. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing? 21. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package? 22. On which playing card is the card maker's trademark? 23. On which side of a Venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening between the slats? 24. On the back of a Canadian $1 coin, what is in the center? 25. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits? 26. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip? 27. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise? ANSWERS 1. Bottom 2. 50 3. Right 4. Blue, red, white, yellow, black, &gold 5. 1, 0 6. Right 7. 20 8. Red 9. 88 10. Clockwise (north of the equator) 11. Towards bottom right 12. 12 (no #1) 13. Left 14. Clockwise as you look at it 15. The Bluenose (ok, what's that? 16. 8 17. Left 18. 5 19. 6 20. Bashful 21. 8 22. Ace of spades 23. Left 24. Loon 25. *, # 26. 3 27. Counter

Ladies Only: I am looking for a companion to spend time with. Someone that we can start out as friends but? that it will eventually lead to a relationship which is what I am seeking. I am friendly, loyal, courteous, well educated and enjoy the simple things in life. The reality is that I want to be able to share my life with someone. I'm not talking about running and get married...no that is not it all. I've been there and done that as they say and I'm really not interested in walking down the aisle again...but one can never say never, who knows? but what I am looking for is a woman that I can be a great friend to and be romantically involved at the same time. Why is finding the right person so difficult? there are so many variables that one must go through, so many obstacles along the way. I am not looking for the perfect woman because I am well aware that perfection in humans is nonexistent but just someone that I can have fun with and have a great time and also become a part of her life and she will do the same. I love a woman that can stimulate me physically as well as intellectually. You don't have be a beautiful specimen or have a Ph.D in Behavioral Science but a regular-looking girl with a brain that can carry a conversation. I tend to be shy and withdrawn at first but once we get going on a given subject, I'm a very good conversalionist in all modesty. I have a Master's degree in English literature so naturally any conversation about books, writers, poets, I am going to be fascinated with. I love music: classic rock from the 60s and 70s and I also like jazz, soul, blues and classical. I like going to the movies, the theater, dinner or just taking a walk along the beach and watching the sun go down. I LOVE sunsets, I can spend a long time watching how the beautiful colors intertwine with the clouds, it makes for a spectacular and most precious celestial sight. I am romantic...yes I am. I still believe in romance and sweeping a girl off her feet with a love poem, candies, and flowers. I guess I'm kind of old-fashioned in that sense. I just want to love somebody and have them reciprocate all of that love in return. I'm really a simple guy overall. I'm not materialistic or selfish and like to share whatever I have with that special someone. I hope I can meet somebody on here. I know that this is not a dating site...believe me I've tried a few of those and so far all of my attempts at finding someone have failed. Most women that I've encountered in the last few years and the ones I've dated seem to want the same thing: MONEY and POWER. I'm sorry but I'm not wealthy and I don't have any power. They all seem to be interested in how much money I make, or what kind of car I drive or whether I own or rent my house and if I own a business. If you're that kind of woman --than with all do respect don't continue reading because I am NOT the man that you're looking for. I wish you well in your seach and hope that you find what you're looking for. I love animals (although I don't have any) but if you have a dog, cat, bird or whatever other species as long as is not extremely dangerous I'm cool with it. Children are fine although I would prefer someone whose kids are pretty much grown but if you have a child that is a minor and living with you, I will understand. I know about kids as I have three of my own. One adult 21 and two teenagers 14 and 15, so I know all about having kids and raising them. I know how difficult it can be especially if you're a single parent. I really admire women that have been forced to raise their children on their own because the father left them and don't receive any kind of assistance either monetary or emotional. I ask that any ladies that read this narrative that sounds more like an advertisement for finding love, LOL and are interested in perhaps meeting and talking with me are from Miami only. I apologize if I seem that I am discriminating against other woman that live in other cities, rest assure I am not. Is just that I would prefer that the person be from Miami which is where I live so that I won't have to travel to another city in another state to meet her, I hope that you can understand. Although any ladies that wish to give me their advice on what they thought about what I've written here is welcome to do so and I appreciate very kindly. Well, I hope to get some responses and hopefully one of those will be the lady that I am looking for. I thank you for taking the time to read this long narrative and I do apologize for its length but I needed to be clear on some of the things that I am looking for in a person and needed to be as thorough as possible. I'm not posting my e-mail because I don't know yet what is going to come out of this but if something positive does which I am hoping than I will be get in touch with that person. Thank you.

32 and never dated, is it to late? Hi everyone. I've been really really depressed lately. I'm 32 now and I have this problem called never having a girlfriend and still being a virgin and loosing every friend I ever thought I had as a result of it. I feel so jelous and pissed off every time I go out and see young couples smooching and holding hands! Or yet some high school punk in his beat up honda with a coffee can muffler cruising around with some hot girl! I just want to yank his *** up and beat the **** out of him and say what makes you better then me! I know that's the wrong additude to have but 20 years of being told that your not good looking enough to be boyfriend material has broken my give a damm!!!! From middle school thru high school to co workers, to friends, friends of friends, to blind dates to online dating so on and so forth for over the past 15 years I always got the same rejection over my looks. I've always thrived to be a good person and treat others as I would like to be treated. I've always offered my complete and total friendship to anyone that needs or wants it, and it has all back fired on me. I can't get thru a day without wondering how my life would be today if I had meet someone 10 or 15 years ago. And I can't lay to rest thoughts of the good times and sweet memories I should have of my youth with someone special that isn't there but only the memories of how I was always told I wasn't cute, good looking, or attractive enough! But every pretty boy Tom Dick and Harry treated them like **** and they loved them just because they was pretty boys!!!! It's hard for me to even look at the guy in the mirror every morning knowing that I've never even been accepted to go on one single date, never been kissed, never had a warm hug and hearing words like I love you. NOTHING! The differance from me and people that wants to kill themselves is that most people have to try to think of ligit reasons to do it. I have to try and think of one reason not to. People I used to consider friends have nothing to do with me anymore because of this and how I don't get ***** everyday like they do. I've been called every name in the book and a new book started. Gay, queer, even pedofile because I've always had a warm spot for kids and used to dream of the day I became a father and the fact that I've never had a women in my life people judged me totaly wrong. Two summers ago I was living in Nashville Tn where I was training to be a railroad engineer. At the same time I was working on one of my car restorations of a 1987 Trans Am. I had just got the paint and graphic work done and was going to drive it back to my home town of Kingsport to let everyone see it. I called up Brian and Mike that was old high school friends and told them I was comming in. They made plans to meet me at circuit city. They made big jokes of my black and gold TA with the big eagle on the hood and ask who are you suposed to be Burt Reynolds? I just laughed about that but I didn't know they had set me up to get me in the store and away from my car so they could have there way with it. They knew how much time, work, and money I had in this thing and what it ment to me and the paint job wasn't a week old. They took red spray paint and painted the words *** boy, queer, and painted a big dick over the bird on the hood. They recorded the whole time on cam making slurs about me and what a looser I am being a virgin and never had a GF! When I came out and seen my car I feel to my knees and threw up right there in the parking lot, I was so weak at the knees I could not stand! I've since lost all faith in people and the future. I feel I'm already dead it's just my body still walks around empty with no sole. Just to answer some questions, I'm not fat I still weigh 147 as I did when I graduated high school. I've always been active and come from a slinder family. I'm 5 foot 10 blue eyes and light brownish hair kinda like Tom Cruise's style. As for ways I've tryed to be the cool cat thru the years, I studied music, voice and guitar thru my early teens and was lead guitarist in a rock band in high school. Took 4 years auto machanics and got into restoring classic muscle cars all thru my 20s as I still some what do. I built a 1972 plymouth duster that I used to drag race and won placks and trophies with before it was stolen in spring 2004 and found striped out 3 months latter in Virgina. Total loss there. I've since went back to college and am now an engineer for CSX railroad. Would you say my window of opportunity has long since shut at this point of my life???? And could someone please tell me where I went wrong and what I have done to deserve this???? Just if you wanna see some pics. http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewPicture&friendID=170902874&albumId=407995 There is more pics in my photobucket just look for T_TopBandit, you can also IM me on yahoo messanger at T_TopBandit.

does anyone want to read this ( i know its so wierd but maybe any yahooligans here wanted to see it ) caution! The Basics Where does fart gas come from? The gas in our intestines comes from several sources: air we swallow, gas seeping into our intestines from our blood, gas produced by chemical reactions in our guts, and gas produced by bacteria living in our guts. What is fart gas made of? The composition of fart gas is highly variable. Most of the air we swallow, especially the oxygen component, is absorbed by the body before the gas gets into the intestines. By the time the air reaches the large intestine, most of what is left is nitrogen. Chemical reactions between stomach acid and intestinal fluids may produce carbon dioxide, which is also a component of air and a product of bacterial action. Bacteria also produce hydrogen and methane. But the relative proportions of these gases that emerge from our anal opening depend on several factors: what we ate, how much air we swallowed, what kinds of bacteria we have in our intestines, and how long we hold in the fart. The longer a fart is held in, the larger the proportion of boring, inert nitrogen it contains, because the other gases tend to be absorbed into the bloodstream through the walls of the intestine. A nervous person who swallows a lot of air and who moves stuff through his digestive system rapidly may have a lot of oxygen in his farts, because his body didn't have time to absorb the oxygen. Encyclopaedia Britannica offers the intriguing statement that some people's farts contain no methane. The reason for this is apparently unknown. Some researchers suspect a genetic influence, whereas others think the anomaly is due to environmental factors. However, all methane in any farts comes from bacterial action and not from human cells. What makes farts stink? The odor of farts comes from small amounts of hydrogen sulfide gas and mercaptans in the mixture. These compounds contain sulfur. The more sulfur-rich your diet, the more sulfides and mercaptans will be produced by the bacteria in your guts, and the more your farts will stink. Foods such as cauliflower, eggs and meat are notorious for producing smelly farts, whereas beans produce large amounts of not particularly stinky farts. Why do farts make noise? The sounds are produced by vibrations of the anal opening. Sounds depend on the velocity of expulsion of the gas and the tightness of the sphincter muscles of the anus. How much gas does a normal person pass per day? On average, a person produces about half a liter of fart gas per day, distributed over an average of about fourteen daily farts. Whereas it may be difficult for you to determine your daily flatus volume, you can certainly keep track of your daily numerical fart count. You might try this as a science fair project: Keep a journal of everything you eat and a count of your farts. You might make a note of the potency of their odor as well. See if you can discover a relationship between what you eat, how much you fart, and how much they smell. How does a fart travel to the anus? One may wonder why fart gas travels downward toward the anus when gas has a lower density than liquids and solids, and should therefore travel upwards. The intestine squeezes its contents toward the anus in a series of contractions, a process called peristalsis. The process is stimulated by eating, which is why we often need to poop and fart right after a meal. Peristalsis creates a zone of high pressure, forcing all intestinal contents, gas included, to move towards a region of lower pressure, which is toward the anus. Gas is more mobile than other components, and small bubbles coalesce to from larger bubbles en route to the exit. When peristalsis is not active, gas bubbles may begin to percolate upwards again, but they won't get very far due to the complicated and convoluted shape of the intestine. Furthermore, the anus is neither up nor down when a person is lying down. How long does it take fart gas to travel to someone else's nose? Fart travel time depends on atmospheric conditions such as humidity, temperature and wind speed and direction, the molecular weight of the fart particles, and the distance between the fart transmitter and the fart receiver. Farts also disperse (spread out) as they leave the source, and their potency diminishes with dilution. Generally, if the fart is not detected within a few seconds, it will be too dilute for perception and will be lost into the atmosphere forever. Exceptional conditions exist when the fart is released into a small enclosed area such as an elevator, a small room, or a car. These conditions limit the amount of dilution possible, and the fart may remain in a smellable concentration for a long period of time, until it condenses on the walls. Why is there a 13 to 20 second delay between farting and the time it starts to smell? Actually, the fart stinks immediately upon emergence, but it takes several seconds for the odor to travel to the farter's nostrils. If farts could travel at the speed of sound, we would smell them almost instantly, at the same time we hear them. Is it true that some people never fart? No, not if they're alive. People even fart shortly after death. Do even movie stars fart? Yes, of course. So do grandmothers, priests, kings, presidents, opera singers, beauty queens, and nuns. Even Yoda farts. Do men fart more than women? No, women fart just as much as men. It's just that most men take more pride in it than most women. There is a large variation among individuals in the amount of fart gas produced per day, but the variation does not correlate with gender. I have read that men fart more often than women. If this is true, then women must be saving it up and expelling more gas per fart than men do. Do men's farts smell worse than women's farts? Based on what I have experienced of women's farts, all I can say is that I hope not. At what time of day is a gentleman most likely to fart? A gentleman is mostly likely to fart first thing in the morning, while in the bathroom. This is known as "morning thunder," and if the gentleman gets good resonance, it can be heard throughout the household. Why are beans so notorious for making people fart? Beans contain sugars that we humans cannot digest. When these sugars reach our intestines, the bacteria go wild, have a big feast, and make lots of gas! Other notorious fart-producing foods include corn, bell peppers, cabbage, milk, and raisins. A friend of mine had a dog who was exceptionally fond of apples and turnips. The dog would eat these things and then get prodigious gas. A dog's digestive system is not equipped to handle such vegetable matter, so the dog's bacteria worked overtime to produce remarkable flatulence. What things other than diet can make a person fart more than usual? People who swallow a lot of air fart more than people who don't. This can be cured somewhat by chewing with your mouth closed. Nervous people with fast moving bowels will fart more because less air is absorbed out of the intestines. Some disease conditions can cause excess flatulence. And going up in an airplane or other low-pressure environment can cause the gas inside you to expand and emerge as flatulence. Is a fart really just a burp that comes out the wrong end? No, a burp emerges from the stomach and has a different chemical composition from a fart. Farts have less atmospheric gas content and more bacterial gas content than burps. Is it harmful to hold in farts? There are differences in opinion on this one. Certainly, people have believed for centuries that retaining flatulence is bad for the health. Emperor Claudius even passed a law legalizing farting at banquets out of concern for people's health. There was a widespread belief that a person could be poisoned or catch a disease by retaining farts. Doctors I have spoken to recently have told me that there is no particular harm in holding in farts. Farts will not poison you; they are a natural component of your intestinal contents. The worst thing that can happen is that you may get a stomach ache from the gas pressure. But one doctor suggested that pathological distention of the bowel could result if a person holds in farts too much. How long would it be possible to not fart? As I understand it, a captive fart can escape as soon as the person relaxes. This means that a lot of people who assiduously refrain from farting during the day do so at great length as soon as they fall asleep. Having been on a great many overnight field trips, long bus trips, and trans-Pacific flights, I can personally vouch for the fact that lots of people do fart voluminously as they doze off. So the answer to the question would be, you can refrain from farting as long as you can stay awake! Do all people fart in their sleep? I have not made a scientific study of this, but I don't think all people fart in their sleep. I think mainly those who refuse to fart when they're awake do so when dozing off. For other people, toilet training takes such a strong hold that they let nothing pass their sphincters in sleep. For these people, the gas accumlates in the night and they vent it upon awakening. Where do farts go when you hold them in? How often have you held in a fart, intending to release it at the first appropriate opportunity, only to find that the fart has disappeared when you are ready for it? I asked several doctors where the fart goes. Does it leak out slowly without the person knowing it? Is it absorbed into the bloodstream? What happens to it? The doctors agree that the fart is neither released nor absorbed. It simply migrates back upward into the intestine and comes out later. It is reassuring to know that such farts aren't really lost, just delayed. How can one cover up a fart? There is a company called Fartypants that sells underwear designed to absorb the odor of farts. If you should be caught without your Fartypants, another ploy is to blame the dog or cat, if one should be present, or complain about how the wind must be blowing from the direction of the paper mill. As for the sound... if you are in a large group of people, act oblivious and innocent, or glance quickly at the person next to you, as if you think he/she did it. Other strategies include coughing or suddenly moving your chair so that people think that they misheard the fart. If you are with one other person, you can act as if nothing happened, and the other person may believe he was mistaken in thinking he heard a fart. CJT addresses the problem of farting loudly in a public restroom as follows: "My solution: use a handful of loose toilet paper, cover your butt hole and it will muffle the farting; my friends and I call it the 'Buff Muff'!" Depending upon the company, another strategy is not to cover it up, but to proudly proclaim the fart as your own grand accomplishment and to issue a challenge to the others to outdo that one if they think they can. Is it really possible to ignite farts? The answer to that is yes! However, you should be aware that people get injured igniting flatulence. Not only can the flame back up into your colon, but your clothing or other surroundings may catch on fire. A survey done by Fartcloud (the site, alas! is not more) indicates that about a quarter of the people who ignited their farts got burned doing it. Ignition of flatulence is a hazardous practice. However, if you want to try it, and you don't have a friend to light your fart for you, you might find it easier to accomplish the job using the Fartlighter. There have also been cases in which intestinal gases with a higher than normal oxygen content have exploded during surgery when electric cautery was used by the surgeon. Why is it possible to burn farts? Farts burn because they contain methane (usually) and hydrogen, both of which are flammable gases. (Hydrogen was the same gas that was used in the ill fated Hindenburg dirigible.) Farts tend to burn with a blue or yellow flame. Is it possible to light a match with a fart? No, even strike-anywhere matches have their limits, unless the fart has the consistency of sandpaper! Any fart that rough I would hesitate to call a fart. Also, farts have the same temperature as the body from which they emerge, and aren't hot enough to initiate combustion. Are there any books about farting? There are several! My favorite is the new book, Who Cut the Cheese: A Cultural History of the Fart by Jim Dawson. This book provides an entertaining and thought-provoking history of the fart in literature, language and society. It is very informative and very funny! Ben Franklin's classic Fart Proudly is still in print. There is a collection of suggestive photographs called Who Farted Now by St. Martin's Press. Most of the photos come from old movies and political shots. For children, we have the famous The Gas We Pass : The Story of Farts by Shinta Cho, and Amanda Mayer Stinchecum (Translator), and the Canadian picture book, Good Families Don't, by Alan Daniel and Robert N. Munsch, about a highly visible fart infesting a proper middle class family. Is it possible for a talented person to earn a living through flatulence? Few people earn their living directly via flatulence. But a friend of mine says that he saw a carnival act in which the performer whistled tunes with his farts, blew out candles on the opposite side of the stage, and sent flames all the way across the stage. A famous performer who earned his living this way was Le Petomane, who performed in France at the beginning of the 20th Century. However, my friend isn't old enough to have seen Le Petomane, so maybe he had a chance to see Mr. Methane. Mr. Methane lays claim to the distinction of being the world's only performing flatulist. His CD can be purchased at the FartMart. However, people may also earn a living through the prevention of flatulence (as do the manufacturers and sellers of Beano and other products), through the practice of medicine specializing in the treatment of flatulence and other gastrointestinal problems, by writing books about flatulence (see the question before this one), and through the production and sales of various fart gags such as whoopee cushions and farts in a can. Fartypants sells a fart filter and a number of other fart-related products. Ultratech Products, Inc., sells the Flatulence Filter, "an activated carbon air filter disguised as a seat cushion." (This link was discovered by Steve of Boulder, CO.) Maybe, if you're lucky, you'll be able to find a copy of Le Petomane's biography by searching at alibris.com. Last time I checked, they had two copies available! What other fart products are available? You can visit the FartMart to obtain an astounding number of wonderful fart products, including the famous Crepitation Contest CD, and several other recordings, Pull-My-Finger Fred (a doll that responds with farts and wisecracks), whoopie cushions and a variety of other fart-noise generating products (some of which are quite high tech), some products which produce a fart-like odor, prosthetic poop, fart sludge, and the famous Fart Machine. Why do dog and cat farts smell so bad? A carnivore's protein-rich diet produces relatively small amounts of intensely stinky gas because proteins contain lots of sulfur. A dog's or cat's farts are rarely audible, but the odor is overwhelming. I have asked biologists why dogs and cats generally fart silently, and their theories include: (1) the amount of gas produced is small, but potent, (2) the horizontal orientation of their gastrointestinal system puts less pressure on the anal opening, so the gas is expelled more slowly, (3) their anal sphincters don't close as tightly as humans' because it takes less force to hold in the contents of the colon -- again because of the horizontal orientation of the gastrointestinal system -- and a loose anus makes less sound, and, my favorite (4) dogs and cats don't feel embarrassed about farting, so their sphincters are more relaxed, leading to less noisy flatulence. Mike F. points out that many dog foods are soy-based, so on top of all the above factors, add beans and stand back! Large herbivorous animals such as cows, horses and elephants, on the other hand, produce vast quantities of relatively non-stinky fart gas. The farts of these animals are noisy and can go on for astoundingly long periods of time. Cows in particular are productive, in part because they swallow huge amounts of air. They need oxygen in their guts for the various protozoa employed there as digestive aids. Is it normal for dogs to like the smell of human farts? Yes, any odor that we find disgusting smells delicious to a dog. Dogs respond to the smell of farts, rotting fish, and carrion the same way we respond to the smell of bacon frying or cookies baking. A dog will often sniff the butt of the farter in order to inhale as much of the odor as possible. I have heard only one story about a dog being disconcerted by a fart. According to a friend, her brother once delivered a fart so evil that it made the dog sneeze, shake his head, and paw at his nose. That was either an unusual fart or an unusual dog. Do fish fart? According to our ichthyologist at the University of Guam, fish flatulence per se has not been studied, although people have investigated fish digestion. They find that although most fish have alkaline intestinal environments like our own, coral-eating fish have acidic intestinal contents. The acid serves to dissolve coral skeletal material. Coral has the same composition as Tums (calcium carbonate). One product of the reaction between acid and calcium carbonate is carbon dioxide gas. Therefore, it is logical to assume that coral-eating fish fart a lot. The other fish probably fart also, for the same reasons that we do. However, Mike Pulte, a great fish enthusiast, said that he has never seen a fish do it. I asked our ichthyologist if it were possible that fish gas would go into the swim bladder instead of out the anal opening. He said that modern fish have an air bladder that is independent of the gastrointestinal tract. The gas comes from enzymatic activity and not from the intestine. Older models of fish have their swim bladder connected to the gastrointestinal tract, but it is attached high up, closer to the mouth than to the other end, and these fish come to the surface and gulp air to fill the bladder. Therefore, we can assume that intestinal gas leaves the fish through the anal opening. We also pondered the possibility of fish making noise via flatulence, but apparently most fish noises are made through belching rather than farting. Lisa P., an aquarium enthusiast, reports that she has seen her fish fart: "I have four aquariums and many fish, and I have personally witnessed fish farting! My goldfish used to do it all the time! You'd see a little bubble come out of his anus and stay there, trapped in the mucus of a long string of poop. (Ugh!) And my opaline gourami does it too. Neither of these are coral-eating fish. I have only owned two coral-eating fish so far, but I have never seen either of them fart. It seems most likely to me that much of this gas comes from air swallowed during eating. Also, goldfish have a very simple digestive system and their food is absorbed inefficiently, so possibly the bacteria have more to feed on" Do turtles fart? Yes, turtles do fart, and their farts smell incredibly bad, as do the farts of snakes. In fact, it is my opinion, based on personal experience with reptiles and not on any formal research, that many reptiles use farts as a weapon. Reptile farts smell so bad that sometimes you can tell that one is nearby in the woods, even on a windy day, before you can see the animal. One day I was hiking through the woods in Arkansas with a friend and I told my friend, "I smell a snake fart." A second later, the snake crawled across the path. Astounding but true! In an article published in the December 2000 issue of Discover, "the world's leading expert on snake sounds," Bruce Young of LaFayette College in Easton, Pennsylvania, affirmed that snakes do fart. The sonoran coral snake and the western hook-nosed snake fart with an audible popping sound when disturbed. Why do horse farts smell worse than people's farts? I'm not sure that horse farts smell worse than our farts, but they do smell different. Horses have a different diet from us and different gut microbes, so their farts have a different composition. They also fart more voluminously than humans, and the volume of the gas can be overwhelming if one is unfortunate enough to be near a farting horse indoors. What kind of animal has the highest worldwide output of flatulence? Believe it or not, the animal that wins this honor is the humble termite. Because of their diet and digestive processes (with more than the usual microbial assistance), they produce as much methane as human industry. Termite farts are believed to be a major contributor towards global warming. Is it true that cow farts contribute to global warming? Recent research has shown that most methane produced by cows and sheep emerges from the mouth rather than the anus. So one could more accurately say that cow and sheep belches are contributing to global warming. New Zealand researchers are investigating methods of breeding methane-free sheep. Is there any kind of animal that doesn't fart? If we define a fart to be an anal escape of intestinal gas, then it follows that animals that lack intestines or an anus cannot fart. Most animals possess intestines and an anus, but there are some that don't. These include: Sponges: These organisms lack true tissues and organs. They have just a few types of cells organized into a bag with holes in it. Water flows into some holes and out other holes. Sponges are so different from other animals that some biologists think we shouldn't even call them animals. Cnidaria: This phylum includes the jellyfish, corals, sea anemones and hydra. Their tissues are organized into a bag with a mouth surrounded by stinging tentacles. Food enters the mouth and is digested inside the bag, after which the leftovers are expelled via the same opening. In effect, the same hole serves as both a mouth and an anus. Any gas expelled by a cnidarian would be more appropriately termed a belch rather than a fart, since the animal lacks intestines and separate anus. Pogonophoran worms: These remarkable animals, who dwell on the sea floor near active volcanic regions associated with mid-ocean ridges, possess no mouth, no stomach, no intestines, and no anus. Apparently they retain their svelte, worm-shaped figures by giving up on eating completely! They survive by means of a mutualistic relationship with chemosynthetic bacteria that live in their flesh. Anyway, these animals cannot possibly fart. A second category of animals that probably don't fart are animals that live very deep underwater. At high pressures, gas remains in solution rather than forming bubbles. So there is a good chance that all those clams, echinoderms, fish and other animals living near the seafloor don't fart because their farts stay in solution and never emerge as bubbles, even though the animals possess perfectly good intestines and anuses. Is it possible to leave a brown spot on your pants because of a fart, and if so, what causes it? Judging from what I see when I do the laundry, I'd say that the answer to the first question is definitely yes. As for the causes, we must remember that what we call "fart" and what we call "poop" are just end-members of a continuum. That is, we can have a pure fart, or a pure poop, or anything in-between, depending upon the admixture of the two. If a sample consists mostly of poop with only a small fart component, you get such things as jet-propelled bowel movements and spongy, floating fecal masses (you know, the ones that refuse to be flushed down the toilet -- they keep popping back up). If the sample consists mostly of fart with only a small poop component, you get what is known as "skid marks" or "fart art." These can also result from inadequate wiping, but the shape of the stain is different in the two cases. Inadequate wiping leads to elongate marks parallel to one's crack, usually with well-defined edges, whereas fart art is generally more circular and has an air-brushed look. Fart art is most likely to occur if (1) a person is suffering from diarrhea, (2) the person is trying too hard to fart, and (3) the person mistakenly perceives the pressure against his sphincter to be gas pressure rather than liquid pressure. Again, that last situation is most likely to occur if the person is afflicted with diarrhea. How can we tell when it's only gas needing to come out, rather than something more serious? Our ability to distinguish between the need to fart and the need to poop is something that we learn gradually in the process of toilet training and early childhood. With the tactile nerve endings in the rectal area, we can actually feel different sensations depending upon what is waiting by the exit. Of course, sometimes we are fooled, especially if the substance at hand is extremely fluid in nature, and that is when we have the unfortunate accident of venting a squirt of diarrhea rather than an innocent fart. What is the best position for farting? That depends on what you are trying to achieve. Years and years ago, I read a novel (can't remember which) that had a character in it who was plagued with intestinal gas pain. The character would coax farts out by getting down on all fours with her butt in the air, pressing her thighs against her belly. So perhaps this is the best position for farting if you are having difficulty getting them to come out. Back when I was in geology field camp, we would sit around the campfire in the evening and ignite our flatulence. It was a ritual. When a fart was ready to emerge, the farter would announce, "I have one." And everyone else would intone, "Assume the proper position." The farter would lie back on his or her shoulders with back propped up, head between the knees, and posterior in the air. The purpose was to give the person with the match easy access to the critical vent. Expert farters of my acquaintance often shift their weight onto one leg and lift the other slightly when farting. I assume that this position is adopted less to aid in the farting process than to signal that a fart is imminent. Why do chicks always deny farting? I suppose I should start by saying that only some chicks deny farting. The rest of us acknowledge our gaseous accomplishments with pride. However, a great many sisters do deny farting. The reason is that they have been misled into thinking that farts are not ladylike. It is a great mistake to say that farting is not ladylike. The reason is that all people fart, including ladies. Anything that ladies do is by definition ladylike, and that includes the emission of anal gases. Is it possible that, by inhaling other people's farts all day long, my own farts will smell more? No, inhaled farts would go into the lungs rather than into the digestive system, and would simply be exhaled again, although it might be possible that some of the fart components might be absorbed into the blood. If you wanted to benefit from other people's farts in the way you describe, you would have to swallow them somehow. Is it possible to get stoned after inhaling two or three farts in a row? I am not aware of any intoxicating agents in flatulence. However, most farts contain very little oxygen, and you may experience dizziness if you are inhaling overly concentrated fart essence, simply from lack of oxygen. On the other hand, if you are inhaling farts in the open air and are breathing rapidly in order to inhale as much fart as possible, you may be hyperventilating, which also induces dizziness. Then there is the intrinsic hilarity factor: farts are so funny in both sound and odor that you might feel high just from the basic entertainment value of farts. Is it possible for a fart to kill you? A great many of you have asked if farts can be fatal, or if you can die from smelling a particularly bad fart. My initial response to this question was "no," but I thought I'd better ask a doctor. So now it is official, the medical opinion I received is no, a fart can't kill you. However, if you really work hard at it, you can manage to kill yourself with just about anything. I recently read of a man who hooked up his nose to his anus with a system involving a gas mask, rubber tubing and a hollow wooden post. He died of suffocation. This story comes from the Darwin Awards, and I personally cannot attest to the overall veracity of their stories. The story of the bed-bound obese man who died from inhaling his own flatulence (and whose farts almost killed the paramedics) is an urban legend that has been in circulation for some time. But according to Buzzbomb43, whom I quote: "In World War Two, the Air Force estimates that around 1000 to 2000 airmen were killed because of flatulence. The reason is B-17 bombers were not pressurized, so when bomber crews operated around 20,000 feet, the gas would expand and rupture their intestines." Now, that is a nasty way to go! There are also, of course, (in)famous stories about excessive farters that bio-hazard small toilet rooms, and when they try to light a cigarette the flame ignites the gas-rich-environment causing an explosion. My personal view about such stories is one of doubt. When you smoke and you fart does it make it smell any worse? (Brittney) Only if you swallow the cigarettes after smoking Brittney. If you settle for traditional smoking (inhaling) - the smoke will travel to your respiratory system and not to your digestive system and hence will have little-to-no effect on the odour of your farts. Of course, a minute mass of smoked Nicotine can (and does) migrate from the respiratory system into blood vessels and downstream to the digestive system (Nicotine is actually a known laxative), but the proportions are too small to contribute dearly to the odours you contribute. However, if you do swallow your cigarettes after smoking - its a different ball game. Cigarettes are produced with measures of Ammonia which certainly intensify gaseous odours. My advise for you therefore is not to swallow. I am guessing the reason why certain people think cigarettes might intensify the bad smell of a fart has to do with the fact both farts and cigarettes produce bad odours. I don't think however that this is a case of competing bad odours that in blend will create a third - even worst odour. Last, while I do not advise you to ever quit farting - I do strongly advise to quit smoking. Can excessive farting cause impotence? That depends on the tolerance level of the person with whom one is trying to be potent! Fortunately for humans, farting doesn't cause tissue damage. Other animals aren't so lucky. Soldier termites can actually turn themselves into bombs by detonating themselves via the explosive release of gas and feces, a process called "autothysis." Is it possible to inhale (suck in air) via one's anal opening? Yes, but it's a rare talent. The great early 20th Century French flatulist, Le Petomane, was able to do this, and in fact was able to suck up an entire bowlful of water (just the water, not the bowl) into his colon and expel it again with considerable force. By sucking in large quantities of air, he was able to perform lengthy shows on stage, and could imitate musical instruments, farm animals, and bird songs, whistle melodies, and play the ocarina. His productions were said to be virtually odorless, which is to be expected from air obtained directly from the outside. Here is a message I received recently (November, 1999) regarding the skill of inhaling via the anus: "i would just like you to know that i am part of a trio, who can suck in air in our anal openings. we are somewhat air-bandits. we can let the longest farts you have ever heard. our record holder, chad, stands at 24 sec. the record for most farts in a row is derek, at 492. and i, robert, have earned such nicknames as: Mad Crapper, gurglemeister, and old wetful. We have followed Le Petomane example, and have mastered the art of farting." Jason W. says, "I am a 16 year old guy that is a part of a 3-man fart on command group. We get together every Saturday night andpractice our talent to songs with a good beat. We accomplish this by getting on our hands and knees, completely relaxing, and our butt hole just opens up and air just seeps into our colons. We then get into position and let them rip. We can so far play a song called "THE EYE OF THE TIGER" (Rocky 3 theme song). We came across another group of 4 guys that can do this during the winter of 2001. We started to get together with them more frequently, and now we have a full fledged band going all on farting...We are going to try to make a CD on some songs we know, but no one wants to let us...I personally have let a fart go for about 75 seconds. On average each Saturday night we let off about 1000 farts EACH! The only problem with flatulating when we want is that now 2 of us can't help but sucking in air through our anus when we sit down." Jason has also provided the following instructions for people who would like to acquire this skill: 1) Get a pillow and a soft surface. 2) Place your ear on the pillow with your head turned sideways. 3) Put your butt up in the air, bringing your knees as close up to your head as possible. This relaxes your anal opening. 4) Once you're relaxed enough, you should feel a strange sensation...this is air traveling into your colon. 5) Through practice you will be able to do this by just sitting down. Adam reports that a student at his high school, known as "The King" could fart "God Save the Queen" by alternately inhaling and exhaling through his anus. The students refered to the inhaling process as "input." Is it possible to swallow smoke and then fart it out your anus? No, smoke consists of solid particles suspended in air. When such a mixture enters the digestive system, the solids condense on the walls and other objects in the gut, or go into suspension in liquids in the system. However, for people capable of inhaling through the anus, it is possible to smoke a cigarette with the anal opening and then blow the smoke back out. What causes the burning sensation that sometimes accompanies a fart? This is generally caused by a recent meal of hot peppers or related spices. The oils associated with these foods remain intact and active all the way through one's gastrointestinal system. If you fart in the bathtub, is the water polluted and should you refill the tub? As long as what comes out is only fart and no poop, your bath water should not be significantly polluted. Most of the gas just bubbles up and contaminates the air rather than the water. Is it true that a woman can fart out of her, shall we say, frontal opening, and if so, where does the gas come from? Yes, it is true! The gas that emerges is simply trapped air, for there is no gas production in the genitalia of a woman. The air can enter because the system is open to the outside. This highly specialized kind of fart is sometimes called a queef. This occurs especially frequently during the sex act, when air in the genitalia gets compressed and is forced out at high pressure. Can a man fart out of his genital opening? I have asked various men this question and they all deny it emphatically. However, elrondh contributed the information that under certain rare and artificially-induced circumstances, a man might pass gas through his penis. In this case, the man's bladder had been inflated for a medical procedure, the air introduced via catheter inserted through the urethra. This gas escaped during later attempts to urinate, "accompanied by a brief but sharp burning sensation." Is it possible to capture a fart in a jar and save it for later use? It should be theoretically possible to do this, but there would be lots of logistical problems. I would suggest using a plastic bag instead of a jar. You might try the following as a science fair experiment: Fart into several plastic bags and seal them carefully. Then fill several other plastic bags with ordinary air. Wait 24 hours. Then get volunteers to smell the contents of the bags to see if they can correctly identify which ones contain the farts. This should tell you if it is possible to store a fart in any useful way. Malachi and Megaera have come up with a way to capture a fart in a jar. They say to do it in the bathtub while bathing. Fill the jar with bath water and then hold it with the open end downward. Lean back in the bathtub so that your fart bubbles will emerge in front of you rather than behind you where you can't see them. Catch the bubbles in the jar, and put the lid on the jar while it's still underwater. This way, you capture a fairly pure fart uncontaminated by atmospheric air. To enjoy your captured fart to the fullest extent, make sure that your jar does not already smell like whatever was it it before, like pickles or peanut butter. Meep wrote to say that her fiancé was an expert fart collector at the age of ten. He used Kodak film canisters, and kept them on a shelf in his room. Experiments on his mother proved the efficacy of his method. Is it weird to enjoy farting? It is not unusual to enjoy farting. I believe that enjoyment of farting is a healthy attitude, since everyone has to fart. If a person is farting to the extent that it creates problems and unhappiness, then a visit to a doctor is in order. Is it common for people to enjoy smelling their own farts? I believe that it is not only common, it is universal. A person farts and then thinks, at least subconsciously, "Wow, I made that!" Can farting be considered sexy? Everything imaginable, and many things not imaginable, can be considered sexy by humans. However, the female southern pine beetle exudes a pheromone called frontalin in her flatulence that not only serves to attract males but acts as a general gathering call to both males and females of her species. Her farts are an invitation to an orgy. Unfortunately for her, her frontalin-laden farts also attract predators. What color is a fart? Farts are, alas, colorless. All of the gases that make up farts have no inherent color. But just think of how interesting it would be if farts were bright orange like nitrogen dioxide gas! It would certainly take the mystery out of who farted. Never-the-less, a high-personality gas like fart gas suggests color to people. Some people envision farts as brown, others as green or yellow. I have always thought of farts as brown, presumably because poop is brown. When someone farts in our car, that person might say, "You better not breathe through your mouth for awhile, or your teeth will turn brown." I knew a toddler who used to draw pictures of farts as yellow rectangles full of holes, like a slice of Swiss cheese. She thought of farts as yellow, and said that she knew they were rectangular because she could feel the sharp corners scraping against her on the way out! Ernie C. suggests that if farts were visible, they would look like pork rinds. Helen says, "It always seemed to me like farts were lumps of coal, black in color and irregularly spherical in shape." Do other people smell a fart better than the farter? The fart should smell just as much for the person who created it as it does for other people. However, the farter is somewhat protected by having the fart propelled away from his body in a direction opposite to his nose. Farting upwind nullifies this advantage. Why is it that when you scratch your *** through two layers of clothing (your underwear and your jeans) your fingers still stink? As pointed out by Barb F., who contributed the term to the fart thesaurus, a fart can be regarded as "aerosolized poop," which means that microscopic fragments and droplets of poop are actually distributed throughout the gaseous matrix of the fart. When delivered from the anus with some force, the components of the fart can penetrate one's clothing and these tiny particles can be trapped in the fibers of the cloth. The particles are transferred to your fingers and then your nose when you scratch and sniff. Why is it sometimes possible to taste farts? The sense of taste detects substances that are either liquid or dissolved in liquid. You can taste a fart when the fart's constituent molecules go into solution in your saliva. Do fart particles disperse in the air and float around until they hit something and then stick to it? The ultimate fate of fart particles depends on the nature of the particles. Gas molecules mostly mix into the atmosphere, although some may react chemically to form new substances. Aerosolized particles of liquid and solid poop probably do condense on surfaces. Most of these particles are polar (with a positively charged end and a negatively charged end) and are attracted to other polar substances or charged surfaces like a monitor screen. Other fart particles condense on microscopic water droplets in the air if the humidity is very high (as in a bathroom), and some particles go into solution in water. Is it possible to have bloody farts? Yes, this can happen if you are suffering from an anal fissure, a split in the wall of the colon. It can also happen to a woman who experiences a queef during her period. Why do farts seem to follow the farter? I'm sure that everyone has experienced this phenomenon, in which one delivers oneself forth of a silent but potent gaseous emission and then steps rapidly away, only to have the fart cling to one's person. Part of the reason for this annoying characteristic of farts is the turbulence that follows in the wake of a moving person. The fart "slip streams" or is actually pulled along in the farter's direction by the air currents behind the person. Another factor is that part of the fart is caught in the farter's clothing, and diffuses out slowly after the main part of the emission has dispersed. Why do farts smell so much worse in a shower than anywhere else? There are several factors. First of all, a shower is a small, enclosed space, so the fart gas is more concentrated, and the high turbidity of the air in the shower circulates the gas through the space effectively. Secondly, the high humidity and high temperature conditions in the shower enhance a person's sense of smell and taste. The farts don't actually smell worse, it's just that we can smell them better than usual. Similar conditions prevail in the bathtub. What would happen if someone farted on Venus? If Venus's surface temperature were a mere 200 to 300 degrees Fahrenheit, liquid water could exist there because of Venus's extremely high atmospheric pressure. But the temperature on Venus is almost 900 degrees Fahrenheit. Because humans are mostly water, a person would not simply emit gas on Venus, but would become gas, a whole-body fart. Venus already has a lot of sulfur compounds in its atmosphere, so a fart on Venus probably wouldn't even produce much of a smell. If you were in space without a suit, would a fart have the energy to propel you forward? Yes, a fart should propel you forward, since there is virtually no opposing force in the form of friction or gravity to counteract the force of the fart. Is it possible to freeze farts, and would they still be smelly after they are defrosted? The water vapor component of farts would freeze quite readily, but to freeze the entire fart would require high pressure and low temperature conditions such as that used to produce dry ice. The fart's composition would be unchanged by the process, and hence would still be smelly upon reversion to the gaseous state. Is it possible for a fart to rip your underwear? This is unlikely, because most underwear is made of material with a fairly high tensile strength, meaning that it can endure a certain level of extensional stress without brittle failure. Furthermore, the porous nature of underwear fabrics allows much of the fart's force to pass through the spaces rather than to stress the fabric. Where does the word "fart" come from? According to Eric Partridge in his excellent book of word origins (Origins: A Short Etymological Dictionary of Modern English), our word fart comes from the Old English word feortan, presumably of echoic origin, meaning that the word was chosen to sound like the object named. When it is cold outside and you fart, can you see it like you can see your breath? Now, that's an interesting idea! My guess would be yes, since farts are nice and moist like our breath, but this is one question that I'm not in a position to answer. I live in the tropics, and it never gets cold here. Several people have tried the experiment and have written to tell me the results. Most people said that they could indeed see their farts, but one person said that he couldn't see it even with his pants off. Here is what anywhere32 reported: "In the boys' locker room after morning water polo practice it was cold out and one of the players only had on his speedo and let out a fart. About four of us saw it and couldn't contain our laughter for the rest of the day." John of the UK said, "Farts expelled in cold air leave what can only be described as a long bushy tail. This is quite funny waiting on a train station platform on a cold dark frosty morning. A person will move away from everyone to a safe distance, and then release a long quiet fart, only to have a sudden and dramatic long bushy white tail coming from their anus; it goes down a little way and slowly curves up ending in a point, just like a dogs tail!" What are some other words for fart? The word "fart" is both a noun (referring to the substance and the sound), and a verb (referring to the act of farting). i seriously have no idea how this was posted as r & s!!!! but i hope u enjoy it as wierd as it is! i just copied and pasted it!! i thought it was funny

Please offer an honest opinion of the prologue for my novel...? The sky always cries when a good man is buried. At least, that's what Grandpa whispered close to Momma's ear as the first drops of rain hit the tent we were seated under in the tiny cemetery. Momma just closed her eyes, nodding her head like she did when the preacher spoke some profound truth on Sunday mornings. I'd heard Grandpa say these words before, on that day last year as we watched President John F. Kennedy buried on the little television set Momma kept in the kitchen. I wondered if it had rained when they buried my father eight years ago, only hours before I was born. I thought about whispering the question to Momma, but the preacher started praying, so I bowed my head with the rest of them and tried to concentrate on the prayer. I once asked Grandpa if God wouldn't like it better if we talked to him with regular words instead of all those fancy ones the preacher used from the Bible. Grandpa said he reckoned God must like the fancy ones just fine since he put them in his Holy Word, but Momma said God liked plain talk just as much and long as I talked to God, she didn't think he minded that I wasn't so fancy as the Bible. This made me feel a little better, since I couldn't remember how to do all the "thee's" and "thou's". A few minutes after the preacher finished his prayer, it was time to walk past Uncle Lester's coffin and say goodbye one last time. I was glad none of the women were bawling and throwing themselves across the dead man, as I'd seen one of them do when we buried Grandpa's other brother, Mervin, two years ago. The sky hadn't cried that day, I thought to myself as Momma tugged me out of the tent. Wonder what Grandpa would say about that? I decided not to bring it up as the three of us walked to the car, with Grandpa's jacket held over our heads to protect us from the rain coming down harder and harder. In the distance, I heard the first rumblings of thunder, and I felt Momma speed up just a little. Momma hated storms for as long as I could remember, often locking herself in her bedroom and hiding under the blanket until it was over. On these days, Grandpa told me to leave her alone since storms brought bad things to Momma's mind. We'd play checkers at the big table in the dining room until Momma reemerged from the room, smiling in a sad way through swollen eyes that told us she'd been crying. I didn't know what kinds of bad things came to Momma when the sky turned dark with rain, but anything bad enough to make my Momma cry that long was too scary to ask about. We made it home from Uncle Lester's funeral just moments before the storm really broke, but this time Momma didn't go to bed to hide from the weather. She went straight into the kitchen and started putting cheese on crackers. When I looked at her questioningly, she said, "Lord knows everybody will still show up here, bringing their casseroles and tears for Uncle Lester, even though the wind's now blowing so hard I can hear the windows shake. No, not even this weather would keep them away, though I wish it would." I hated the way her hands shook everytime the sky rumbled, and I hated the people who would show up at our home and keep Momma from hiding herself from the storm she was so afraid of. I wanted to go to her, like I saw Grandpa do sometimes when that sad look would come into her eyes, and hold her and tell her in a soft voice that it would pass. I don't know why I didn't, except I wasn't sure my little eight year old arms would be enough to comfort a fear as big as the one I could see etched in every part of her face. She must have sensed something in me, because she smiled and put her arms around me. I buried my face in her blouse that smelled like the vanilla perfume I'd bought for her birthday. Knowing she was wearing it made me smile. "That's better," she said, lifting my face to look into hers. The fear had relaxed some, and I marveled at how beautiful she was. Momma was what Grandpa called a classic beauty, never needing any of the other makeup other women wore. Though sometimes, like today, she wore a bit of pink on her lips and cheeks. "Momma, did the sky cry when you buried Daddy?" I regretted asking at once, as I saw the tears come up in her brown eyes and felt her whole body stiffen again. She let go of me and turned back to the cheese and crackers. I reached out to touch her hair, the same color as her eyes, but drew my hand short. I'd hurt her with my question, and I didn't want to do anything to make that wound deeper. "I'm sorry, Momma. I just thought... because Grandpa said at Uncle Lester's funeral... " I turned to leave the kitchen, wanting to repair the damage I'd done and bring back the woman who'd held me so tight only seconds before. "Bishop," she said, and I spun quickly to look at her. "Go paint me a sky, Bishop Ryder. Paint me a blue sky to look at when I can't hide from the dark one outside. Paint sunshine to help me forget about all the dark skies I've ever seen." At that moment, the doorbell rung. Momma was right, the weather hadn't kept the mourners away. I could hear Grandpa walking down the hallway from the little room he and I shared. I heard him greet the people at the door, and I heard them murmmering all the words people say when somebody dies. I heard all this, but I was looking into Momma's eyes. She'd not looked away since she'd spoken, and I realized she was begging me. Pleading with her eyes to do as she'd asked, and make her memories of dark skies go away. "Paint me a sky, Bishop," she whispered softly one last time. Putting a soft smile on her face, she walked past me to help Grandpa greet our company. In my bedroom later that evening, after the storm had finished and all the people had left and Grandpa and Momma were outside smoking their cigarettes, I pulled out the watercolors I'd gotten for Christmas the year before. Momma told me she was tired of looking at my dark pencil drawings, so she'd bought me a whole set of paint with a little book showing how to mix and blend to get any color I wanted. It wasn't long before I began creating full canvases of landscapes that Momma insisted we hang in the living room. That night, I began to mix colors to paint Momma's sky. I knew just the blue I wanted to create, it was the same color as my eyes. Momma told me once she loved my eyes because they were blue like my Daddy's had been, and not dark like hers. It was one of those rare times when she talked about my father, and I sat quietly beside her, hoping she'd say more. She didn't, though, instead getting very still until Grandpa changed the subject. As I painted, I made the sky the same light blue as my eyes, as the eyes of a Daddy I'd never seen. I painted for hours, finishing just as Grandpa came in and began dressing for bed. When he saw the picture, he told me to take it to Momma's room right then instead of waiting until morning. "If anything will cheer her up, Bishop, it'll be that painting," he said, crawling under the blankets of his twin bed. I wanted to ask him so many questions, like why does Momma need cheering up when it was his brother we'd just buried and he seemed to be doing fine. I wanted to ask him why the sky hadn't cried when we buried Uncle Mervin, and why Momma hated storms so much. So many things I needed answers for, but he was already snoring softly, so I left him to his dreams and took Momma her blue sky. Of course, she loved the painting, declaring it the best I'd done so far and giving it a place of honor on the wall opposite her bed. "That way, there will always be a blue sky when I wake up in the mornings, "she said, hugging me to her. I smelled the vanilla again, mixed with cigarette smoke. It was the best thing I'd ever smelled, and I wanted to lay there with my head against her chest all night. It wasn't long, however, before she let go and told me to go on back to my own room with Grandpa. She looked again at the sky I'd painted for her, and smiled. I felt good inside knowing I made that smile happen. Momma's Sky hung in the same spot for several years, and I'd often see her looking at it when the clouds would roll over outside, threatening us with the storms she despised. I like to think my painting kept the sky blue for Momma no matter what, and perhaps it did for a while. Then a storm rolled in that changed our lives forever. The dark skies Momma always hid from finally found her, and no amount of blue paint would make them leave, though God knows I tried.

I posted this last week, but I'd like some more opinions. This is the prologue for my first novel...? The sky always cries when a good man is buried. At least, that's what Grandpa whispered close to Momma's ear as the first drops of rain hit the tent we were seated under in the tiny cemetery. Momma just closed her eyes, nodding her head like she did when the preacher spoke some profound truth on Sunday mornings. I'd heard Grandpa say these words before, on that day last year as we watched President John F. Kennedy buried on the little television set Momma kept in the kitchen. I wondered if it had rained when they buried my father eight years ago, only hours before I was born. I thought about whispering the question to Momma, but the preacher started praying, so I bowed my head with the rest of them and tried to concentrate on the prayer. I once asked Grandpa if God wouldn't like it better if we talked to him with regular words instead of all those fancy ones the preacher used from the Bible. Grandpa said he reckoned God must like the fancy ones just fine since he put them in his Holy Word, but Momma said God liked plain talk just as much and long as I talked to God, she didn't think he minded that I wasn't so fancy as the Bible. This made me feel a little better, since I couldn't remember how to do all the "thee's" and "thou's". A few minutes after the preacher finished his prayer, it was time to walk past Uncle Lester's coffin and say goodbye one last time. I was glad none of the women were bawling and throwing themselves across the dead man, as I'd seen one of them do when we buried Grandpa's other brother, Mervin, two years ago. The sky hadn't cried that day, I thought to myself as Momma tugged me out of the tent. Wonder what Grandpa would say about that? I decided not to bring it up as the three of us walked to the car, with Grandpa's jacket held over our heads to protect us from the rain coming down harder and harder. In the distance, I heard the first rumblings of thunder, and I felt Momma speed up just a little. Momma hated storms for as long as I could remember, often locking herself in her bedroom and hiding under the blanket until it was over. On these days, Grandpa told me to leave her alone since storms brought bad things to Momma's mind. We'd play checkers at the big table in the dining room until Momma reemerged from the room, smiling in a sad way through swollen eyes that told us she'd been crying. I didn't know what kinds of bad things came to Momma when the sky turned dark with rain, but anything bad enough to make my Momma cry that long was too scary to ask about. We made it home from Uncle Lester's funeral just moments before the storm really broke, but this time Momma didn't go to bed to hide from the weather. She went straight into the kitchen and started putting cheese on crackers. When I looked at her questioningly, she said, "Lord knows everybody will still show up here, bringing their casseroles and tears for Uncle Lester, even though the wind's now blowing so hard I can hear the windows shake. No, not even this weather would keep them away, though I wish it would." I hated the way her hands shook everytime the sky rumbled, and I hated the people who would show up at our home and keep Momma from hiding herself from the storm she was so afraid of. I wanted to go to her, like I saw Grandpa do sometimes when that sad look would come into her eyes, and hold her and tell her in a soft voice that it would pass. I don't know why I didn't, except I wasn't sure my little eight year old arms would be enough to comfort a fear as big as the one I could see etched in every part of her face. She must have sensed something in me, because she smiled and put her arms around me. I buried my face in her blouse that smelled like the vanilla perfume I'd bought for her birthday. Knowing she was wearing it made me smile. "That's better," she said, lifting my face to look into hers. The fear had relaxed some, and I marveled at how beautiful she was. Momma was what Grandpa called a classic beauty, never needing any of the other makeup other women wore. Though sometimes, like today, she wore a bit of pink on her lips and cheeks. "Momma, did the sky cry when you buried Daddy?" I regretted asking at once, as I saw the tears come up in her brown eyes and felt her whole body stiffen again. She let go of me and turned back to the cheese and crackers. I reached out to touch her hair, the same color as her eyes, but drew my hand short. I'd hurt her with my question, and I didn't want to do anything to make that wound deeper. "I'm sorry, Momma. I just thought... because Grandpa said at Uncle Lester's funeral... " I turned to leave the kitchen, wanting to repair the damage I'd done and bring back the woman who'd held me so tight only seconds before. "Bishop," she said, and I spun quickly to look at her. "Go paint me a sky, Bishop Ryder. Paint me a blue sky to look at when I can't hide from the dark one outside. Paint sunshine to help me forget about all the dark skies I've ever seen." At that moment, the doorbell rung. Momma was right, the weather hadn't kept the mourners away. I could hear Grandpa walking down the hallway from the little room he and I shared. I heard him greet the people at the door, and I heard them murmmering all the words people say when somebody dies. I heard all this, but I was looking into Momma's eyes. She'd not looked away since she'd spoken, and I realized she was begging me. Pleading with her eyes to do as she'd asked, and make her memories of dark skies go away. "Paint me a sky, Bishop," she whispered softly one last time. Putting a soft smile on her face, she walked past me to help Grandpa greet our company. In my bedroom later that evening, after the storm had finished and all the people had left and Grandpa and Momma were outside smoking their cigarettes, I pulled out the watercolors I'd gotten for Christmas the year before. Momma told me she was tired of looking at my dark pencil drawings, so she'd bought me a whole set of paint with a little book showing how to mix and blend to get any color I wanted. It wasn't long before I began creating full canvases of landscapes that Momma insisted we hang in the living room. That night, I began to mix colors to paint Momma's sky. I knew just the blue I wanted to create, it was the same color as my eyes. Momma told me once she loved my eyes because they were blue like my Daddy's had been, and not dark like hers. It was one of those rare times when she talked about my father, and I sat quietly beside her, hoping she'd say more. She didn't, though, instead getting very still until Grandpa changed the subject. As I painted, I made the sky the same light blue as my eyes, as the eyes of a Daddy I'd never seen. I painted for hours, finishing just as Grandpa came in and began dressing for bed. When he saw the picture, he told me to take it to Momma's room right then instead of waiting until morning. "If anything will cheer her up, Bishop, it'll be that painting," he said, crawling under the blankets of his twin bed. I wanted to ask him so many questions, like why does Momma need cheering up when it was his brother we'd just buried and he seemed to be doing fine. I wanted to ask him why the sky hadn't cried when we buried Uncle Mervin, and why Momma hated storms so much. So many things I needed answers for, but he was already snoring softly, so I left him to his dreams and took Momma her blue sky. Of course, she loved the painting, declaring it the best I'd done so far and giving it a place of honor on the wall opposite her bed. "That way, there will always be a blue sky when I wake up in the mornings, "she said, hugging me to her. I smelled the vanilla again, mixed with cigarette smoke. It was the best thing I'd ever smelled, and I wanted to lay there with my head against her chest all night. It wasn't long, however, before she let go and told me to go on back to my own room with Grandpa. She looked again at the sky I'd painted for her, and smiled. I felt good inside knowing I made that smile happen. Momma's Sky hung in the same spot for several years, and I'd often see her looking at it when the clouds would roll over outside, threatening us with the storms she despised. I like to think my painting kept the sky blue for Momma no matter what, and perhaps it did for a while. Then a storm rolled in that changed our lives forever. The dark skies Momma always hid from finally found her, and no amount of blue paint would make them leave, though God knows I tried. The working title is "Paint Me A Sky, Bishop Ryder" It might change later, but for now that one works for me.

Just started this story, rough, rough draft, looking for opinions? Part 1 of 4 – How this all came to be… 1. Wednesday’s are notorious for being the slowest day of the week. Every tick of the clock seems to move backward, and watching it only makes those movements backwards a hell of a lot slower. And as those ticks clicked backwards, Johnny could feel his pulse and temperature rising ever so slightly. The back of his neck felt like sun burn after being slapped, and his blood pressure bumped and thumped like the blood was trying to break loose. He’d look back at the clock, waiting, and waiting, and waiting for 3:15. 3:15 was the book of Revelation to him. It meant the day was over, at least for a couple more hours. It meant he could back home, relax, take a shower, masturbate, discuss the meaning of everything. But 3:15 was still a ways a way. He yawned and positioned himself in as many awkward positions as time would allow. Any awkward position would keep him awake, but only for a moment. Soon his inner body would adjust, and start falling asleep again. He felt mechanical. Two sides of him were competing for attention. Neither one was really winning, except whoever was making the more rationale argument. I could leave. Leave early, say I have a doctor’s appointment. (You would miss the rest of the lecture) I’m missing it anyway. I can barely stay awake. (You’re parent’s aren’t paying for you to sleep) Shut up. (You’ve got a child on the way) Those words woke him up more than any awkward position was ever going to. It made him breath deep breaths and sweat big sweats. He wasn’t even sure who he was, and now he was going to have to direct someone else’s life. It didn’t help that the professor was talking in somewhat hypnotic speech. Eerily soothing, and causing those eyelids to become perhaps a dozen times heavier than they already were. Johnny stuck it out. Just like he did every Wednesday. 2. Across campus, Timothy was already deeply engrossed in another afternoon film. It was the second film he had watched today. This semester he cleared most of his schedule for watching movies. He got a job at the campus library checking in and out books. Occasionally, he’d push the rack all over the library placing books in their respective places. He mother fucked the Dewey Decimal System to high heaven, claiming their had to be an easy way to catalog books. He always assumed someone else could do it. This afternoon’s selection was the 1948 Orson Welles version of Macbeth. Timothy was on a Shakespeare kick for the past two weeks. He’d brought home just about every version of Hamlet from the library last week. Bragnah and Zeffirelli and Olivier and Burton, not to mention the half dozen or so stage productions with names no one would ever recogonize. He said he saw something about himself in the character of Hamlet. Something about the madness, and the way Hamlet carried himself. The library was the perfect place for him to work. The campus library housed nearly every film ever made. The rows and rows of cinema, past and present, screamed “watch me.” Timothy was just the person to do that. 3. Concluding her fourth week teaching was Jocelyn. She was just finishing a lecture on neurons and how they worked. “Remember there is to be a test on Monday. This is going to be on. I’m going to ask you some tough stuff.” Her voice was drowned out by the sound of zippers and notebooks closing. You wouldn’t think of a notebook closing, making any noise at all. But given the onslaught of three hundred notebooks, and it was a symphony of whooshes and wishes. The semester was just getting started. She had settled in nicely, to the student teaching position. It curbed most of the cost of her graduate education. Her parents were happy about this. They weren’t so happy about the seven month unborn child she was carrying around. Unmarried. Still in school. Oh yes, her parents were plenty worried about that situation to even fully appreciate the tuition waiver for her graduate work. She had refused to tell her parents who the father was. At least up until now. Her parent’s patience was running thin, and she soon would. But first she had some thing of her own to clear up. She was constantly pondering her graduate degree, wondering and wondering if any of it was worth it. She wondered if she only enrolled to quell the fact that this child was the end of her young life. No condoms, how could I be so stupid. She thought this constantly, and consistently. She felt like the girl in the sex ed video, who stayed home on Friday, when her friends went out, just so she could watch her baby. Her friends, all of them, were so supportive, but their eyes fed her that thank-god—that’s-not-my-child look. She could feel their eyes move up and down her body, the same way a guy does to a girl he sees coming his way. But there eyes were not with with lust, or love, but complete relief. No fucking condoms, you stupid piece of shit. The last of the students headed out the door, just as she was gathering up her things. Just a lonely pregnant women in the middle of the auditorium, all alone. That’s how things for her had felt lately. 4. “The ending is more pronounced because of the change that Ching Fong goes through.” Johnny professors says, to a mostly interested class. Johnny’s arousal level is less than willing to continue. Who would have thought 18th century Japanese literature could be so boring? Johnny wondered if all literature was so boring. He even went as far to wonder if culture in general and everything about it was this boring. All the films, books, and paintings. Every poem, paragraph and page every written and typed, was it all bullshit. “What do you think, Johnny?” his professor asked. He realized his wandering eyes, and heavy yawns had attracted the attention of his teacher. “Uh, yeah.” He answered. The class giggled in unison. He had no clue what the lecture was about, hadn’t even paid attention in the last week. Johnny wasn’t even entirely sure he was reading from the same book as everyone else. “Mr. Walsh, part of your grade is participation. So I am asking for your opinion.” The professor was dead serious, in your face. The class’ eyes were all on him, waiting for his opinion. “I’m going to be honest, I have no clue what you’re talking about.” He answered. The laughs came back, but there were fewer this time around, like an inside joke that only a few are apart of. “Looks like that will be an F for participation today, Mr. Walsh.” The professor stared at him, half expecting a reply but continued right on with what he was talking about. Johnny wondered what this guy was like in middle or high school. Probably the kid who got quarters thrown at him in study hall. Johnny laughed on the inside at the thought of flying George Washingtons hitting him on the head. His gazed returned to the outside, where the weather was becoming more and more brilliant by the moment. The clouds were turning a light gray, not the kind that bring rain, but the kind that make Johnny feel complete. There was a slight breeze, he could discern from the swaying trees. Some kids were playing soccer on the lawn. Kicking the black and white ball back and forth. It didn’t appear there were any defined goals. There didn’t need to be, the whole point was just to be outside. Some other kids were just sitting under trees text or fictional books sprawled across their laps, ingesting the whole sum of human knowledge. Johnny’s deep blue eyes slightly watered at the thought that this was it. This room would be the end of him, and he knew it. His mood was in a downward spiral since the start of the summer. When she told him. When she told him, that within her, his seed had reached her egg, and together they were creating a child. She hadn’t quite put it like that, but he always preferred the most defined definition he could reach. I gave it to her. I gave it to her too damn good. (Better watch your mouth, round that newborn) My parents swore around me, and look, I’m fine. (Yeah you conceived a child that you have no clue how to care for) He remembered an idea from Introductory Psych. Objective Self Awareness. Whenever the focus shifts inward, you enter this state of subject awareness. When your self and self image don’t align, it produces negative feelings. His teacher then suggested this is why we see so many IPODS and ZUNES. So people can drown out their own thoughts and remain focused outward. Johnny sighed and succumbed himself to the last fifteen minutes of class. The outside was not much farther away. 5. “This is terrible.” Timothy said out loud to the walls and the carpet, and the stack of recently viewed movies on the floor. Among them such classics as the Campbell Scott version of Hamlet, the 1989 film When Harry Met Sally, and the fifth Star Trek film. The odd assortment of films was the way Timothy liked to watch them. He never liked to watch the same genre twice in a row. The past two weeks had been a rare exception to the rule. Consistency was key, as he examined the various productions of Hamlet. Timothy was looking for the differences between each production. The smallest of details, such as camera or lighting, and he jotted them down in a notebook. With his copy of Hamlet to his side, Johnny would here him all the way down the hall. Quoting Shakespeare four hundred years after the Bard had suffered the deep dark plunge we all go to. “Oh all you, host o heaven! O Earth! What else?” Timothy would recite. It would seem the voice were coming from the walls, or that Johnny was schizophrenic. But no, not at all. It was the sounds of the Globe Theatre traveling through time, and space to America. To Pennsylvania. To Pittsburgh. It was being absorbed in the hearts of the young, being prepared for passage to another generation. Timothy was not enjoying this version of Macbeth at all. Maybe it was the black and white of it all, but Timothy could not even stand to finish it. He turned it off and returned it to it’s proper case. His afternoon was carefully planned to have enough time to watch this, then the Roman Polanski version, then study for the up and coming “exam of the semester, quite possibly my life” is what he was calling it. The change in plans gave him some extra free time. So he stared at the wall, working on the story waiting to be poured onto paper. 5. Johnny quickly left the lecture hall, not wanting to be stopped by Professor Asshole on the way out. For the obvious and not so obvious reasons. The first of course being he was afraid he might actually slip and call him professor ASSHOLE! And the second being, he didn’t feel like getting the paying attention will help you do better lecture. Or the I’m not standing up here for my health lecture. He’d heard them before, or some version of them. He had pretty much been uninterested in anything but philosophy since he took his first class all those years ago. The ideas and thoughts and logic of the past four thousand years was constantly bouncing around in his mind, and his pure undivided attention was constantly on that. Pondering and wondering. Thinking and reasoning. 6. Timothy had a notebook where he kept pictures and comments. Little shreds and bits of information that he eventually thought would help him in the screenwriting process. His whole view of Planet Earth changed when he would doodle away at the notebook. The cries for help from Africa, the depleting ozone layer, the pollution and over population, the whole world just went away. His friends, mostly Johnny, often wondered if there was a screw or two loose. Something just never made sense with Timothy. In all actuality, that is just the way he presented himself. One step behind the rest. He scrawled a few shapes and figures into the notebook. Hoping that some ultimately amazing wonderful tidbit of dialogue would come pouring outward onto the paper. Some great quote that college kids, and adults alike would continue saying for years afterwards. Something inspirational, and spine tingling. His getting longer by the day black hair was at his eyes right now. He loved the way it blew in the wind, even if everyone he knows did not. He was slightly chubby, but nothing a doctor would recommend a safer diet over. Most of the clothes he wears are two sizes too big, and he only shaves when he absolutely has to. Yet he cannot grow a full beard at this point. More like sporadic spots of hairs. A “chin strap” is what some up tight sorority girl had called it last semester. His school nurse, and his eye doctor all decided he should wear corrective lenses. He never does, except when he’s behind the wheel of a car. The glasses he has now are the same ones he got in junior high. He writes in his notebook: The fate of your life is directly affected by the fate of those around you. “That’s the worst quote in the history of quoting.” He says to himself. He ponders lighting up the old bubbler. Let rip a few quick hits of the wacky tobaccy before he sails off to watch the other version of Macbeth. He draws a man drowning at sea with a bubble above it screaming help. Next to that he draws a big boat and writes TITANTIC along the side. The guy in the tower has a bubble now too. It says “sorry pal, can’t stop for nothing.” He laughs to himself and closes the notebook. Another day at the office he assures himself. 7. Jocelyn is walking down the aisle of the auditorium, the weight of her bag to her side. If someone was observing her from the backside, they would think she was having a seizure the way she was walking. She could truly care less though. Abortion was an idea that she hadn’t really thought about at all. She remembered in the weeks after she told Johnny she was pregnant, she could see it in his eyes. Those eyes that were begging for an abortion chit chat. It seemed to her that he was just waiting for her to bring it up.She had wanted to talk about it, but every time she saw that he was eager and willing to get rid of this child, it angered her, and made her want it that much more. And now, she insisted it was too late. She remembered when she was an undergrad, and walking along Forbes Ave, some old lady was holding a great big poster, depicting an abortion at twenty-three weeks. The picture was disturbing but effective in one aspect. She stopped and yelled at the old woman, declaring it was a women’s right to choose. She even attended a march for Female’s Rights a few years back. She had always argued in favor of it, but now, when it was her child, she couldn’t help but cradle her belly and imagine the life she planned to give her child. Whether or not Johnny was going to be apart of it, was debatable. 8. In the last ten minutes of each hour, the hallways filled up with students from every area of the globe. Johnny had come from a suburban white man’s paradise. Coming to Pitt was the biggest culture shock he had ever received. A lifetime of one type of person, and suddenly inserted into the throbbing heart of the idea of America. He had savored every moment, unlearning everything K through 12 taught him. Public Education, he declared in an essay, was flawed. It was one dimensional. He considered the pledge of Allegiance. Writing about the pledge, he realized he couldn’t even remember it. We spend thirteen years, reciting the Pledge daily, to leave it behind once we leave high school. He had not said it once since then. And it was a system of control. Implemented by men in suits far away trying to curb individualism. Or so he had wrote. “Hey.” A voice called from behind him. It was Justine. He turned to see her smiling and eager to talk. “Hiya.” He replied, smiling. Justine was a nice break from the going to be a father routine. “Boring class.” She said, slugging her book bag over her shoulder. “Is it ever exciting?” he questioned. “You damn philosophers, always asking questions but never coming up with any real answers.” She laughed. Johnny leaned in real close to her, almost directly next to her ear. “That’s what makes us so attractive.” He laughed, and so did she. It was a I-Want-You laugh. But both of them knew the reality of Johnny’s situation. Both of them knew that on it’s way was a boy or girl, and for the next eighteen years or so, Johnny would be busy cradling, raising, and sending off to college a child. “You wanna go get a cup of coffee?” She asked. He shook his head. He wondered what they were brewing down at the French Press. “Alright, but I insist on you buying.” He laughed again and they took to the steps. Johnny this is masturbation. (Dude) Well, you’re a child, and this is the big boy’s menu. (Touche) 8. Jocelyn stopped to talk to one of her students waiting outside the auditorium. Her name was Tammy, and she nearly waited everyday outside the door. Tammy always asked the most interesting questions about psychology. She seemed generally interested in it, and Jocelyn assumed this girl would eventually declare psych as a major. She just hated the idea of her waiting till after class to ask the question. Tammy was obviously shy. But the questions she was asking were ones the whole class could benefit from. “Ms. Everett, hey, how are you.” Tammy said. She was still holding her notebook, and glancing at it as she walked up. “I’m pregnant.” She replied, solemnly. She hoped the question would be simple. She wanted to go lie down and eat a half pint of ice cream. “Oh, really, I hadn’t noticed.” Tammy smile, nervously. “Anyway, I just have a quick question.” “Concerning neurons?” “Ummm, not quite. I was looking through your page on the school’s website.” She started. Jocelyn felt suddenly violated. You looked at my website, for what? “I saw that you were a part of a undergraduate research project.” Christ, this is going to take forever. “And I was curious how one gets involved in such things.” She was just a curious student, curious like she was when she started school. Interested in how the great big gray matter could produce feelings of love, hate, and complete and utter dissatisfaction with life. “Tammy, I have to head to a OB appointment. Can you stop by my office tomorrow around 11. I’ll give you all the details, and introduce you to the researcher involved in that.” “Oh, yeah, sure.” She laughed, but it was filled with anxiety, and embarrassment. Jocelyn didn’t really have an appointment, at least not today. But she was exhausted, lugging her bag of education all around campus. She never envisioned doing this while pregnant. She suddenly was jealous of her friends from high school. They were either engaged or married to men who were going to take care of them for the rest of their lives. Till death or divorce do them part. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.” Tammy hurried off. Jocelyn watched as she walked away and headed out the door. Was Tammy so much different then her three years ago? She wondered if she had just shattered a girl’s dreams of making a difference. She always said the biggest problem with the youth was no one wanted to make a difference. Perhaps it was because there were so many problems that the aspect of making a difference was such a loaded issue. Global warming, overpopulation, health care, mental health. There were more problems than solutions associated with those. And now it was her generation’s responsibility to correct all this. The past fifty years of American Hedonism and unilaterialism had pretty much destroyed any prospect of America in the future. And now, when her generation failed there would be nothing but cynicism towards her. She imagined her child, starving to death, or dying of an uninsured illness saying “Thanks a lot, Mom. Thanks for letting me die.” She felt like crying. And maybe as she was watching t.v. and eating Ben and Jerry’s she would. She would let a small river, or creek of tears stream down her face and try and be optimistic. 9. Timothy burnt his thumb lighting up his bubbler. He usually did, especially when trying to take a big hit. Smoke billowed up from the marijuana, and he held in the lung-full hit he had taken. He could feel it lingering in his lungs. A little longer. He could see the gray color sinking into his lungs, and the smaller molecules journeying to his brain. He could see the smaller molecules binding to his neurons, and completely fucking him up. Joceyln had explained it all to him one time. One day when the two of them were stoned, she told him exactly what happened upstairs. He always liked getting stoned with Jocelyn, but she hadn’t smoked in a long, long time. Ever since she decided she wanted to be a doctor. But only lately had she become the uptight chick she was. At this point, he just felt bad for Johnny. He could see the way Johnny looked at her and knew his friend didn’t want that. But the two of them were far past breaking up at this point. Even if they wanted to, they had been brought up to respect the idea of the American family. Raised in a house with a mom and dad. The sad part was that neither of them were completely sure of it. Johnny had never said anything, but it was the way he acted around her, or didn’t act around her. He did not respond to her like he used to. It used to be she said jump, and he was in the air. But now, it seemed it was all Jocelyn could do to keep him around. He remembered one night he’d come home from class, and there was a note one the table saying he was going away for a little bit, to clear his head. Johnny had just up and left. But he was back by the next day. When Timothy asked him what was wrong, he just said he was stressed and left it at that. Another big hit, and he could feel the drug kick in. Everything became heavy and light. It felt like his conscious was trying to keep up with reality.

Do you like my story so far? I started writting it and already posted some, but people wanted it to be updated so here is all i have so far. English, A. Math, A. Science, A. History, A. Those are all the important grades. But of course, just to be safe, A in home economics, gym, and French. Just to be safe. That is Heather Romero’s motto. Everything had to be perfect. If risks were involved it was out of the question. If something sounds like fun, there is probably a chance of getting hurt or having a bad reputation. And that was unacceptable. As always because her grades were so amazing, she is being aloud to go on a special trip this winter. She really didn’t want to go because this time she was going alone and was even thinking about flunking on purpose. But how would that look? She can never keep a secret much less flunk on purpose if it made her feel guilty. Heather looked around her room. A wooden desk matched the wooden bookshelf beside it. Her bookshelf is her only vacation she feels she needs away from life. Books on adventures, tragedies, romance, school, drama, suspense, illness, fairytales, cooking, animals, space, classic novels, and more. All take her to a world that works her way, even though she didn’t write the story. Beside her wooden shelf of joy was a window cracked open with curtains stressing to grasp the center of the room as the wind blew. The smell of rain entered the room. Heather took a deep breath, stood up from her bed and walked over to her dresser. Her suit case sat on top of an open drawer which held neatly folded clothes and other organized necessities. She released the air and looked into the mirror. Her red blotchy cheeks contrasted with her blue and green speckled eyes. She brushed back her dark blonde hair. Had she really been crying? Over something as silly as leaving for the winter? Over something as stupid as not seeing her annoying big brother for 5 weeks? Not possible. “Heather? Are you ready yet? Tallia will be here soon.” “Coming!” she called back to her mom. She zipped up her suitcase and closed her window then walked out into the front room. Her cousin Tallia was going to drive her up to Tallia’s cousins parents house where she was staying for her vacation. At least she was staying in the mountains, she’s always wanted to do that. As she walked through the hallway, she noticed Tallia had already arrived. In the room, was her mom, dad, brother, Tallia, and some other boy she’s never seen before. Linda noticed her daughter starring at the stranger trying to remember ever seeing him before. “This is Victor, Tallia’s friend. He is also going to be on the trip.” Victor grabbed Heathers limp hand and shook it. “I hope you don’t mind me. Tallia is giving me a ride up there too.” Heather blinked twice then stuttered back, “Um, yea, I-I mean, no I won’t mind, n-not like …um, I forgot something.” She skipped to her room to avoid him seeing her blush. Of course she wouldn’t mind. He was cute. His dark hair and tanned skin looked great with his stylish surfer clothes. He is probably from California. But how does Tallia have a friend from California, and what is he doing on this trip? It’s a long drive from California to Iowa. Then again he could be from Iowa too, and just naturally have that look. Heather shook her head to clear her mind and grabbed her sunglasses. “Did you get what you forgot?” Victor asked. “Um, yea…I needed sunglasses.” Gavin laughed, “What for?! Gosh Heather I swear, I should have never dropped you on your head when you were a baby.” Dale sighed and shook his head. Linda laughed. “What?,” Gavin demanded. “Snow blind,” Victor said. He grabbed the sunglasses from her hand and put them on. Even though they were girls, he looked good in them. ‘Is he flirting with me?’, Heather thought, ‘Or is he always like this?’. “Victor! Your always weird like this, give it back.” Tallia scolded. Well, there’s the answer. “You kids better get going if you want to make it, before it gets too late.” Tallia nodded and grabbed Heather’s bags to take to the car, Victor followed. “By squirt,” Dale hugged Heather. Linda grabbed Heathers arm and hugged her, “Have fun, sweaty! We’ll miss you!” Her mom let her go and glared at Gavin. “What? I wasn’t doing anything!” Linda sighed. Tallia peeked around the door, “All ready Heather?” “Yea.”, she waved one last time then went to Tallia’s car. She stopped on the porch. Parked in her driveway was a 2008 Chevrolet Camaro SS. “Whoa! Tallia how did you afford this?” She closed the trunk and smiled, “My job pays well.” Well at 24, she does have a lot of potential, but what job could she possibly have? "BTW IM 15!" happy?