Overhaulin'

Deadly Love part 1 please read?

I looked at my room, what was left of my room. I look at the colorless walls like most of the house. My dark carpet that had gotten warns out over the years. The walls were slanted. The blue carpet was a darker. I dragged my hand against the hard thick dirty carpet. I felt my finger numbing as I rubber then against the carpet harder. There was gum on the floor it had turned black since before. My room was empty. It was always like that. I felt the cold golden knob against my warm fingers cooling. I walked through the narrow hallway with the white walls. The house felt so empty. We had gotten clear of the house months ago when we lost the house in January. I walked into my mom’s room. Her brown walls were hollow. We were ready to go to Del Monte Forest, California were uncle Hon lived. We were going to live there since we lost our house and need to stay some were. I walked though so big brown door that were the doors of my mothers room. I felt the cold golden knob against my warm fingers cooling them. ☼1☼ “Mom”? I muttered. My voice went higher than I expect it. There was a box in the middle of the lime room that was my mothers I walked to the box and looked what was inside. There was a picture of Scarlet, my twin who resident had gone missing three months ago after our Birthday and was calmed dead. I look at my sister she looked much like me she had my warm smile. my long reddish hair that went up to my neck. She had my long round classic nose. She had my almond green eyes but the only thing she did’t have was my beauty under my eye. I saw the lady that was my mother she looked quiet like me but was darker and quiet smaller. She had long thick hair up to her neck it was tied into a tress. She was a dark brunette tone. She had big green almond eye. she had laugh lines to. I heard mom chuckle “Over here”. She said her voice was cold and hard. I walked into the bathroom the blue color walls were dark “Mum, wait get these to the car”. She said making no notice that I was right next to her. She look at me holding the picture. She grabbed the picture from my hand and smiled warmly. “Remember were we took this picture”? she said about to cry. “At Santa Cruz last August”. Said. “OH”. She said. “Your sister looks just like you”. She said almost about to cry. “I wish she was back”. She said whimpering. I grabbed the boxes she was hold. They made my hand upset they were as a result heavy for me they were half my size. I walked out hearing my moms foots step behind me. I felt the cold air hit against my skin making it hard to breath. “Come on”. I heard someone voice. It was Elliot. ☼2☼ Elliot had long black hair like mom. He was a dark tan color that almost made him look black. He had big brown eyes. He was tall only thirteen years old my little brother had gotten bigger he was almost my size. I let the boxes fall into the car it was a black Toyota Hybrid with 23 horse power. “Get in”. Mom said her voice got hard. What was her crisis she 2want us to go now she mad. Sometimes I don’t get her. I got in the car Elliot was in the back. I got my backpack. I knew she knew I lied I was always a bad liar she would all way know if I lied. We had lost our house about a month ago. Mom had lost her job as a singer in Roxy’s chill curb. Mom hadn’t paid the bills since then. There was a dead silent’s in the car. It was a long time I could’t wait o get to the airport so I would’t have to see Conner one last time. We got to the William R. Fair child airport. I saw the car stop in front. I got out of the car and stretch my legs that were so numb. I walked over to the back of the car. I grabbed me suitcase from the back they were heavy to like the boxes but not that heavy. “Charlie, Elliot”. I heard her croak. “Mom we’ll be fine I promise I’ll take care of Elliot”. I said. “Ok”. She said. “Just call if you want to come back Charlie ok.” she alleged. I did’t want to stay I just want mom to be happy it WAS’t because of my selfish reason. “Mom, dose it mater Eastern doesn’t have any space”. I said. “I’ll miss you kid, I love you guys” She said. “Now call me when you get there ok and email my every day k.” she said her voice went to a high pitch after throwing her gum away. “I will mom”. I said. ☼3☼ “Ok now go I don’t want you guys to be late.” She said. She hugged me and Elliot for one last time. The last goodbye to her to the Port Angles. Goodbye to my old life I would begin a new chapter in my life. We gave are ticket to a lady with a big grin on her face.” Have a good flight”. She said her voice was kind of squeaky. We look for are seat A4 and A5. The people were shoving me against the walls in the plane. I was running out of air it felt like my lungs getting punched out of air. I got out my inhaler and shoved it in my mouth rapidly so I could breathe a

Public Comments

1. Okay, first of all, you have ALOT of spelling mistakes. I counted 4 in the first paragraph! But it seems good.