Overhaulin'

A message to all who have online affairs.?

I notice that many questions here revolve around spouses who have affairs on the internet. I would like to make a broad statement directed to those who participate in this form of infidelity. First of all, someone you meet online will obviously be more appealing than the spouse you see every day. Think about it, this new person has never nagged at you, left the seat up, argued with you over finances, etc. etc. Yes, your online Romeo or Juliet is PERFECT! If you don't believe me just ask them (or read their profile). They will always describe themselves as loving, loyal, understanding, fun, and don't forget....have a great income. Money will never be a problem and they will shower you with gifts and attention for all of eternity. Oh, I almost forgot...they will please you sexually like nothing you've ever experienced. Just think of how lucky you are to have met such a perfect individual on the internet. Oh, don't worry, I'm sure you are the FIRST person he or she has shown any interest in. After all, a person this loyal and wonderful couldn't possibly have used the same sweet words and charm on anybody else. You're probably the first person they've ever talked to seriously on the internet anyway. Don't be concerned if their conversation always seems to go in the direction of sex. I'm sure they just want to please you and their own desires are of no concern. Perish the thought that they may be after easy unattached sex...no way. Go ahead and meet them somewhere secretly for sex. Now all you have to do is rid yourself of that boring old spouse whose faults are too many to list. Isn't it exciting? A BRAND NEW lover who is everything you ever dreamed of. Once your free of the mistake you married, your life will be perfect. No more problems. Now whatever you do, don't listen to people who warn you that anyone who you cheated with will cheat on you as well. I'm sure their internet romance days are over now that they've met you. In closing I would like to tell a story. I once had this old car. It was great when it was new but after a few years I started seeing new cars that had more appeal. My old car was reliable but I was bored with it. I test drove a few new cars and they were much better than my old car. Finally I took the plunge and bought the perfect new car. It drove great, ran great, and looked great...for a while. After a few months I noticed it was developing more rattles than my old car. My milage went downhill considerably as well. Then came the door dings and scratches. One day my wonderful new car broke down and while I was waiting there for the tow truck I saw my old car pass by. It was still going while my new car had died. I stood there wishing I still had that old car because even though it wasn't as shiny, it was steady and reliable. This could never be, however, because someone else now owned and loved the car that I was once bored with.

Public Comments

1. i dunno... i like my new shiny new Lexus IS350.
2. Truly words of wisdom!
3. Amen!
4. Looks like you had a bad experience...seemed a little bitter...ur spouse had an online affair?
5. So true.
6. Kudos. You make many valuable points.
7. i hate to say it but.... its all true ....* looks the other way* lol i have met someone over the net that gave me better love then my old flame and i was married lol but then i feel in love with someone else... but also me and my husband been going though a lot so. i knew it was bound to happen sooner or later .ugh i guess what you say is true but then Again if you found love on the net sometimes that person is meant for ya.. you never know.
8. Bravo!!
9. How inspiring. If you think your going to have an effect on people who have no regard for anyone but themselves, I'm sorry. You won't. People are always going to cheat, and lie, and hurt the people that mean the most to them. Because in this society. Nothing is ever good enough for them. That's why they call them selfish.
10. That is exactly why I keep my affairs in the real world.
11. Nice diatribe or sermon or whatever. When you are ready to jump down off your high horse could you please explain to me how one can have "an affair" online. "An affair" by definition is two people having intercourse outside of their marriages. I would just love to know how one has intercourse with a computer??? Now about that shiny new Lexus????
12. Thanks for such a fine message. You are so right. I can tell you are smart, focused, educated, well behaved and headed in the right direction on life challenges. You have been awarded a Platinum star and a seat next to Dr. Phil for such a brilliant message.
13. Well thats all fine and dandy, but long as hell and wheres the question? Thanks for the advice and the 2 points =)
14. WOW i could not have said it better
15. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence...
16. But what if you know your online lover isn't perfect, or any of the things you suggested?
17. Girl, I thought you were talking about getting a dog online. But let me ask you this. Did you ever get that car fixed and how does it run now?
18. Preach it!!! I must say, I have never had any type of affair, but you make great points. Hopefully you will prevent someone from having one. It will save a lot of heartache, Im sure.
19. I met my husband online. I agree w/ all you are saying about online AFFAIRS but not about meeting ppl online. You can say the same about someone who cheats w/ a person they met on the street. They just want something that looks new and shiny to them.
20. well put,. hope my selfish husband reads this,
21. Where is the question?
22. Bravo!
23. AGREED. You do not know someone unless you are in their life. It's nuts to think that someone you only know virtually is even capable of presenting their true self--if they even wanted to! And most people hold parts of themselves back, even in an anonymous, virtual world. I definitely do!! You have to spend time with someone in the real world, with all the real world stresses before you can even begin to think you know them. This takes time, and it takes getting to know them authentically (i.e. not secret rendezvous' for sex.) No one should EVER trust too easily under inauthentic circumstances--the nature of the situation has to be considered. Good point, because I have definitely noticed an increase in the online affair kind of questions, which, imo, is a ridiculous concept. I don't agree with them, but I thought one of the sole benefits of an affair, was the SEX?!?! Just my two cents.